Death and Destruction (Jeff the Killer Fanfic)

7. Long gone

"What did you see?" I slapped one hand against the other to try and snap her out of it, "I can't tell you what happened if I don't hear it."

"Jeff the fucking Killer! Some bastard with missing eyes and dark skin!" Her voice raised and everyone was looking our way now. Bingo baby. Make a big scene for me, "you're the one who said you could fucking call them!"

"That was an empty threat to get you off my back," I laughed incredulously, "you really think I have some direct number to a killer hotline? 'Ring-ring, can you put Eyeless Jack on the phone, I need him to scare someone for me'? I haven't even talked to my cousin since before she went missing. You're fucking delusional if you think I was being serious."

"Y-You—!" Claudia seemed to realize how stupid she sounded as the crowd murmured, her eyes blazing as she shook an accusatory finger at me, "I'm going to fucking get you for this, Nina, just you wait."

She left in a huff, even Yoni and Malcolm looking on with disdainful eyes as they watched her go. A few people looked my way and I just shrugged, playing dumb as I went back to getting my books. I felt like the cock of the fucking walk as I made my way to class, my triumph quiet but still there. It sure felt like a good day to be me.

Eyeless Jack

"I've got to say, I'm going to miss her."

Jeff and I had started toward the nearest train station, deciding taking a route west into California before heading north would be the best trail to follow. It'd take us nearly half the week just to get there but luckily once we got back to Silver Cove it shouldn't take us long to actually find her. I hoped, at least.

"She's got a little soft spot in my heart," Jeff chuckled, "always comes in guns blazing, she's going to turn out just like Snow. I'm looking forward to it."

"Well, hopefully not just like her," I reminded him and he nodded.

"She's a good kid though," he sighed, "Snow's proud I'm sure."

"Is there a reason you still won't call her Kitty unless you have to?" I asked curiously as we hopped a fence, grabbing his bag as he tossed it over.

"It's just like I said, she's not Kitty to me. Kitty's the name of some prissy rich-bitch spoiled brat that relies on daddy to keep her out of trouble. Snow is ruthless, cut-throat, doesn't give a damn what people think and she's got the fucking guts to back it all up. It's not that I don't think of her as Kitty but it's just so much more natural to call her Snow."

"Whatever you say man," I laughed, pulling my hood up as we approached one of the trains, "which number was it heading west again?"

"Should be 824," he hummed, pointing to the right one, "shit, looks like they're moving. Go, go!"

We howled with laughter as we leapt over the tracks, leaping through open boxcars before catching up to the one we needed. I hopped on first and held my hand out, gripping his tightly as I lifted him onboard before we both fell to the ground. He bumped his knuckles against mine and we relaxed for the ride, kicking back against the wall while the sun slowly began to set outside.

"I used to have to do this a lot," I said suddenly, catching his attention, "it's how I got up to Oregon in the first place. Didn't know any other way but this one."

"How did you get away from that town?"

"Hitchhiked back before people stopped picking them up, people weren't eager to leave a twelve year old stranded in the desert. Made it out to SoCal before I found my other family and they took me in for a while until I started showing signs. Sent me to live with my cousin a little further north and then, well, you happened."

"I happen to everyone," he snorted disdainfully, "I told Snow a long time ago— back when she killed Kara— that every time I kill someone, someone else loses someone they love. It's just how it is." Jeff seemed to lose his snarky tone as he continued. "I probably told myself that a lot just so I didn't feel like it was meaningless. Some sort of...justification. Really, I just like the thrill of it. I never cared until..."

"Jules," I chuckled, "then Kitty."

"What was she like? Jules."

"Jules...she was Kitty's impulse control," I reminisced as I thought about her. Truth was I hadn't in a long time and I felt bad for it, Jules was my ginger-snap and she'd always been a sister to me, "except that Jules had her own impulses that Kitty always backed wholeheartedly. Day-of tattoos, peer pressuring each other to drink, crazy road trips across the country. They were perfectly destructive for each other in the best kind of way, if that makes sense."

"I think I can understand that." He nodded as he sat up, crossing his legs underneath himself and lowering his voice to a mutter. "I can't believe I took someone like that away from her. I always find myself wishing I could've seen the two of them together, they always look so...happy, in these pictures."

"It was always pretty crazy," I said a little wishfully myself, "I think you'd have liked her. I wonder if Delilah has a ouija board sitting around, I'm sure we could give her a ring, let her know we're sorry."

"I'm not sure sorry would cut it for someone I killed without a second thought."

That sadness in his voice caught me off guard. Jeff...only ever sounded sad when he talked about Kitty being gone but this was heartbreaking, even for me. For a ruthless killing machine to regret something so wholeheartedly felt all kinds of wrong. He curled up and mentioned something about being tired that I knew was bullshit but I left him to it, moving to sit by the door instead and watching the world pass us by as we crossed state lines.

My mind wandered back to the time before things went awry; the drinking contests with Jules and the endless nights of parties and music with all of my friends. I desperately wished for those days back but at the same time I'd accepted a long time ago I'd never be able to really have a life, especially not a long one. I had a sort of epiphany as I sat there, the sun setting on the horizon and casting everything in wonderful shades of orange and pink: I may have loved Kitty but the life I could give her wasn't any good either. Even if she did love me back my future was bleak, my time already up and at this point I was just running from the reaper. I looked back at Jeff and even though he wasn't in the best of shape either, at least he'd be able to survive a lot longer than I would. Thomas, you fucking numbskull.

It was hard to do but I finally admitted to myself that Kitty and I would never be able to be together. I'd clung to these last wisps of hope for so long that it felt almost relieving to finally let them go. Just as I'd sighed my breath hitched, a cough echoing in my chest as I held my face in my elbow. When I pulled it away I realized there was liquid on my sleeve and upon further inspection I discovered...it was blood. My body seemed to confirm it for myself that I was on borrowed time at this point. I didn't want to worry Jeff any more than he already was so I stayed put, continuing to daydream about the life I could've had while I let him sleep. Maybe we could have all been friends, I mused, if I'd never gone off the deep end; murder sprees with Jeff and Kitty in new cities, party nights at the house as I drank away the rest of my days with my friends by my side. It was a nice thought, at least.