Reaching for the Stars

Chapter 20: Lovestruck Fool

Surprise update!

Well not really surprise. I'm planning to move the update schedule to 1, 11, and 21 every month, so you get 3 chapters each month instead of 2. I mean, it's 50+ chapters, it's still going to take some time till the last chapter.

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Some said that love was the best thing in the world. It felt like he or she was the world, and you would give anything for him or her, even your life. Some said it was like being in the heavens where nothing bad would happen.

But to Tom, it was the worst thing that exists. It was eating himself alive, no, it was killing him. He survived fights, being shot and stabbed, being left alone in the middle of an alleyway, yet nothing could compare to the feeling of loving someone who didn't love you back.

Imagine, he chuckled emotionlessly, he was now entitled to joke that if someone wanted to feel dead without dying, they could just love someone who didn't love them back.

Right now, he probably loved Max.

He probably loved the dog because after Max stopped all communications with him, he felt like he was lost, as if something important in his life was gone. The dog even blocked him from WhatsUp. While his name still appeared in the groups, he never replied to any of his messages. He no longer answered his calls. He no longer asked for his study guides or help doing homework. Heck, he no longer greeted him when they ran into each other, which now happened rarer and rarer. He dared be the first one to greet him, but the dog didn't answer or when he did, it was with a curt nod and a few words of greeting.

Tom knew that if he reacted and confronted Max when he was with someone, it would give something away. He tried to meet him in some of the classes, but he always came late and left early. He tried to meet Max in his dorm, but his roommate said Max rarely stayed there anymore. He asked Andy and the football guys where was Max but they didn't know.

Where the fuck is Max? And why do I have a crush on a bloody homophobe?

Maybe what Max said was just putting it mildly, he was a homophobe after all. Of course he would be, not even fate cared about me.

But Kevin went back to his mind. He seemed to be okay. He said he and Max still hung out like usual, though less often. Tom even went all the way and asked Kevin what kind of touches he did to Max. Kevin just shrugged and said some of them were kind of offensive while the rest were just casual touches.

The red wolf asked him what was this about, but Tom just thanked him and left his dorm.

Just... just... what is this? What the fuck is this? He took the possibility of Max ignoring him completely but this was nothing like he imagined. He imagined Max would ignore him if he did something awful like groping him in his sleep or outright asked for a fuck. That was just a simple kiss!

That was just a simple kiss, right?

Ha, nothing's gonna change between us, my arse! When he finally confronted Max, he was going to punch that sentence right to his face.

Tom gave up. He gave up. He couldn't continue this. He was the one who started this by initiating that kiss, and now he admitted his defeat.

Some said that love was about sacrifices. Some said . Some said sacrifices were needed to get what you want.

They were just college buddies, for fuck's sake! What could they possibly sacrifice? Their classes? Tom's national conference ticket? Max's football career? Their entire fucking college life?!