Something New

Seventeen

Pagkasara ko ng kwarto ni Em-em, pupunta sana ako sa kusina para uminom ng tubig pero iba ang nadatnan ko. Nakasarado na ang ilaw at ang nag-iisang lampara sa may salla lang ang nakabukas, nakaupo sa sahig si George habang sa maliit na lamesa sa harap nya ay isang malaking bote ng alak na bawas na.

Hindi pa nya ako napapansin, probably because I'm in the dark so I went to the kitchen to grab a pitcher of water and a glass. Ilang minuto ko yata syang pinanuod habang nasa dilim lang ako. Sa isang kamay ay baso ng alak ang hawak nya habang walang emosyon na nakatingin sa picture frame na hawak nya sa kabilang kamay. 

When I look at the place where that familiar picture frame usually stays, it was confirmed that it was their picture with their mother and Em-em who was still a baby in the said picture.

Pagtingin ko sa orasan, 11:30 na ng gabi at napaparami na rin ang inom nya ng alak. So I decided to walk near him while still holding the pitcher of water.

Inilapag ko yun sa maliit na lamesa at naupo din sa sahig sa tabi nya. 

"Ang dami na ng nainom mo, mauubos mo na yang bote." I said but he just shrugged his shoulders before smiling sarcasticly.

"Pwede bang umuwi ka na? Bago pa.....bago pa ako matulad sa nanay ko." sabi nya pero dahil sa kalasingan nya, naging bulong ang ibang mga salita nya kaya halos hindi ko din naintindihan.

His face was red, but he doesn't look like he's that drunk, or magaling lang syang bumalanse, I don't know which is which.

"May kwento ako sayo, alam mo bang yung nanay ko ginawang kabit? Kabit ng t*ng**ng lalaking yon. Kung pwede lang na mamili ng tatay. Hinding-hindi ko sya pipiliin." he angrily said and I don't know why my heart felt suffocated from what he said, na kahit ako nasasaktan sa sakit na nakikita ko sa mga mata nya ngayon.

Who hurt you George Archival? Am I right all along? That the people who created you was also the one who broke you?

"Ginawa nyang kabit ang nanay ko na nananahimik, nagmahal lang naman si nanay. Pero anong kinalabasan? Isang bastardo." mariin nyang sabi bago uminom ulit ng alak sa baso nya at galit na inilapag iyon sa lamesa.

"Don't say that." I whispered as I felt sad while looking at him. He look so hurt, basta na lang nya hinagis ang picture frame na hawak nya dahilan para mabasag yung frame before covering his eyes with his palms.

Nakapatong ang mga siko nya sa kanyang tuhod at tila sa buhok at mga mata nya ibinubuhos ang galit na nararamdaman nya. 

"Akala ko sya na ang pinakamabuting tatay, sabi nya noon babalik sya, sabi nya noon saglit lang syang mawawala. P*ta, bumalik sya kung kelan natanggap ko ng wala na akong tatay." 

I wipe away my tears while listening to him, his anger was creeping in my system and what makes me cry the most was the hurt and hopelessness in his eyes. 

Like he was lost.

George sigh and lean on the chair while his right hand still holding his hair, na parang doon sya kumukuha ng lakas, it was the time that I saw a tear fell down from his left eye and maybe he was so drunk to the point that he was laughing humorlessly.

"Alam mo ang nakakatawa? Hindi ko alam kung kanino mas magagalit, kung sa nanay ko ba na palaging nagpapakatanga, o sa pamilya ng tatay kong mapagmata."

"After 8 years, binalikan nya lang ang nanay ko para gawing parausan, hindi para panindigan, at anong naging bunga? Panibagong anak na tatawagin lang bastardo ng pamilya nya. Tanggap ko kung ako ang sabihan nila non, pero hindi si Mikko, walang kasalanan si Mikko." sabi nya habang umiiling-iling.