Sacred New Beginnings

Chapter 20- We'd Never Get Far

June 1st 2016

The last month in Taylor's life has been interesting to say the least. She finally ended things with Adam, knowing in her heart that her life right now needs to be focusing on how she can make this a safe environment for Bella and figuring out what she actually wants. Although, the break up hasn't come without it's fair share of drama.

"I don't care what he's saying, Tree, none of it is true but if I try to defend myself then I'm just going to look guilty," Bella watches as Taylor paces the room in front of the big windows looking out over the city. As soon as the break up became public news the singer knew she was going to be hounded by the media, and with Bella now seven and a half months pregnant she just couldn't take any risks so they've been laying low and avoiding the public the best they can.

Taylor pauses, her fingers running through her hair as she glances over to Bella with a soft smile, "I know it's not what you wanted to hear, Taylor, but it might be a good idea?" Tree is wary of upsetting her boss, she knows Taylor is already on a rocky edge at the minute and one more thing could be enough to topple her. "I'll lay low for a while, if it doesn't go away then we can say something, but I'm not going to stop living my life because of him, he's already destroyed so much of me," her voice is exhausted and broken and it's hard for Bella to see the woman in this way, "okay, I'll call if anything else happens, try and stay offline."

They share a few more words before ending the call and then Taylor practically throws her phone away from her before sinking down into the couch beside her daughter. "Are you okay?" The teen isn't exactly sure what to say or how to help Taylor feel better and Taylor just gives her a gentle smile as she opens her arms for a hug, "I will be once all of this dies down, I've dealt with worse break ups."

Her memory immediately reminds her of the torment she got after her relationship with Harry - she's sure it would be hard to ever receive hate that bad again. "Are you sure you wanna come to this appointment with me? Karlie said she'd take me," Bella has to go to the doctor today but she doesn't want to force Taylor out in front of the paparazzi if she really doesn't want to. "We both know how that went last time, I think I'll be okay," the singer laughs as she rubs Bella's arm. They both know how hard it is for Taylor to be at Bella's appointments but Taylor gets too anxious when Bella is with anyone other than her, at least this way they have each other.

"Are you ready to face Jenny and Will?" Taylor laughs as Bella sighs, she appreciates how eager they are to be involved but it's a lot for the teen who is still trying to come to terms with the fact that she's got so little time left to prepare herself to really face this whole situation. "I guess I have to be, I just wish I could get through one appointment without hearing about the nursery they're building for him or how excited their families are."

They've talked about the fact that Bella doesn't have to give him up if she doesn't want to but the teen is set on her decision. She can't be his mom, so Jenny and Will are going to be his parents and Bella is going to get to watch him grow up from a distance. It's the only outcome she could really live with.

"Alright, I'm gonna go and get dressed, will you be okay?" Taylor laughs as she pushes herself up to look at Bella, "I'm the parent, I should be asking you that." The teen shrugs, running her hand over her bump, "just because you're my mom doesn't mean I can't worry about you."

Again, Taylor is caught off guard by her choice of words. "What?" Bella laughs as she moves to the edge of the couch and the singer shakes her head, "I'm just incredibly lucky to have you and I'm grateful for that every day." Bella smiles as she squeezes Taylor's hand before getting up, "I love you too."

The pair have their own demons but without the other they wouldn't have made it this far with so much sanity left. They've always got each other, even if nobody else acknowledges it that way.

---

"Why is she late? She's never late," Bella is anxiously pacing the waiting room as they wait to be called for her appointment. Jenny has never missed an appointment about the baby, and she's a teacher so it's not like she's working right now considering that it's the middle of summer. "Hey, she probably has her reasons, it's going to be fine," Taylor reaches for Bella's hand, bringing the teen back to her seat.

"What if they've changed their mind? What if they don't want him? What do I do then?" Her brain has sent her to extreme worst case scenarios and the singer just gives her a warm and reassuring smile as she holds Bella's hands, "that isn't the case, sweetheart, and even if it was we would figure it out. There are plenty of people in the world who want a baby and can't have one." Bella knows that they're prepared if something like that happens, she picked out multiple couples from those files and the adoption agency has those if something went wrong with Will and Jenny.

"Hi, I'm so sorry, I was waiting for Will but he got pulled into work - I hope you don't mind if it's just me today," the woman rushes into the waiting room soon after and Bella sighs a breath of relief, "of course not, we're just glad you could make it, right Bells?" Bella nods in agreement as Taylor squeezes her hands. As hard as it is for her to acknowledge the adoption, she is glad that the couple are so invested in the baby.

"Isabella Faulkner?" They look up to the nurse as she's called back and Bella takes a deep breath before getting up, Taylor taking her hand as Jenny follows them and they go back to the doctor's office. The nurse leaves them in the room and Bella gets comfortable as the two women take a seat. This is such an awkward situation every time, but she doesn't want to push the Coldwells out of the pregnancy when he's going to be their child.

---

"Taylor, look this way,"

"Taylor, who's the kid?"

"How do you feel about Calvin's response to your break up?"

She truly has no idea how they find her half the time but Taylor just keeps her arm around Bella as security leads them to the car. Neither of them react to the questions, they just keep their heads down and walk close together until they get to the car, Taylor helping Bella into the SUV and the teen sliding over to let her foster mom in beside her.

As soon as the door is closed and they pull away from the curb it's finally safe for Taylor to let her frown slip as she looks over to Bella with a warm smile. "Are you doing alright?" The teen gives her a reassuring smile as she nods, her hands resting on her bump, almost as if she's protecting the baby. "I know it's a lot, I'd avoid them if I knew how," Taylor hates that Bella is surrounded by paparazzi whenever they leave the house, she deserves peace, especially when she's only weeks away from having a baby, "it's not your fault that they won't leave you alone, they're pathetic."

Taylor gives Bella a thankful smile and they both sigh, the teen watching out of the window as they make their way back towards the apartment. She's really considering a major change in her lifestyle. She's so sick of facing the paparazzi every day, she just wants to live a normal and peaceful life with her kid for a while. She loves her job but hasn't had a normal life in a long time and now that she has Bella to think about, she really needs to rethink her priorities and what she's actually okay with.

"Can we have Thai food tonight?" Bella frowns as she looks back to Taylor, the singer looking up from her phone as she laughs, "sure, honey, anything you want."

She doesn't know what she wants right now, but she does know what she has and she's so beyond grateful for her daughter.