Love Deception and Obsession

Chapter 11

I was unable to focus the last few days since getting back. I did go to my lawyer to have him serve Nancy divorce papers. I wouldn't be able to look at her like I use to. I had to move on and I knew that but it didn't mean it didn't hurt though. Since being back I've cried everyday and I hate myself for it. Yolanda and Rachael called me. Even Evalyn called me but I just couldn't speak to anyone right now. I was still neglecting my job and I had to stop doing that or else I wouldn't have a job to go to so today I made appointments and called clients and forced myself to move on. I was at Starbucks getting me a coffee when I spotted Evalyn. Lord knew that I didn't want to talk but once she spotted me she begin making her way towards me I knew I had no chance at escaping. Damn why did she have to look so much like Nancy? I found myself fighting back tears. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. She stopped in front of me just as I opened them.

"How you doing girl?" She asked and I sighed again.

"That's a dumb question."

"You're right. I'm sorry. You go back to work yet?" I shook my head.

"I mean I'm making an attempt to move forward but the pain is still so fresh. And it doesn't help that you look just like her. I can't stand to look at you." I said looking away and she gave a small smile.

"Sorry girl."

"Its not your fault that your sister cheated on me." I shook my head. I didn't want to think about it but honestly this is all I thought about since the day it happened. Damn.

"You still considering counseling?" I pinched the bridge of my nose.

"Yes I'm making an appointment today. I don't think its gonna help the fact that I'm going crazy but I guess I'll give it a try."

"You're not going crazy. Your just hurt."

"Nancy was the only thing keeping me together. With everything we've been through. Counseling is my last chance to keep my sanity."

"Can I have a hug?" I walked into her arms and she hugged me tight. I didn't know how much I needed a hug until now. I needed something to help me keep my sanity. I just didn't know what that something was.

After saying my goodbye to Evalyn and meeting up with a client I went to the gym. I didn't have gym clothes but the sweat pants I had would do. I was there for about a good hour just pounding at the gym bag when a familiar face entered. It was Yolanda. I thought that she would be with Racheal today. I continued pounding at the bag as if I didn't see her. Of course once she seen me she begin making her way towards me. Leave me alone. Please. I thought to myself but of course she still came. I continued pounding the bag fighting my emotions. I was done crying. I was done crying. But as I thought that the tears came. She had the pity look on her face that she was good at. I sometimes thought the girl was just too nice. I didn't stop though. I continued pounding the bag. She stopped once she got to me and just watched.

"How you holding up?" Ignoring her I continued hitting the bag. I ignored the tears and the pain that was not only in my heart but also in my arm. It begin to hurt but I ignored it. I wanted to just disappear. I wanted people to just stop asking how I was doing. Couldn't they see the pain I was in? "Brandy?" I pound on the bag harder. "Brandy." Before I could react Yolanda was holding me. I must have blacked out. "Dammit." She helped me to a bench. "Have a seat."

"Dont ask me if I'm okay. You already know that I'm not." I said before she could open her mouth.

"Maybe you had enough of the gym for now." She said instead.

"Maybe you're right." I stood but grew dizzy.

"Easy. You need me to take you home?"

"No I'm good." She stood and grabbed my hand before I could walk away. "Yolanda please don't show pity to me."