Between Two Fires

^.^ Chapter 31 ^.^

Finally, I calm myself down enough to pull back and look into his eyes. Up close I see fresh tears slowly trail down his own cheeks and gasp in surprise. "Why are you crying? You don't need to be sorry - I - you didn't hurt me I just - I've never had to speak about this so I guess it just caught me off-guard..." I whisper the last part. His arms release me and I bite my lip to stop myself from begging him to leave them where they were. I felt cold without them.

"I actually don't know why I'm crying. I don't really remember the last time I did." His answer is genuine. "Its just - seeing you crying and hurting - it - well I felt angry at your dad and sad for you and then - " He isn't making literary sense but I nod in understanding and take a moment to admire the fact that instead of pity, Luca was actually sympathising with me.

It felt....nice. Sincere.

Seth had always thought I was ok and I never would have imagined him crying over any situation. He was actually rather emotionless in most sad situations. Luca had caught me off-guard but the fact that he had felt so much for me that he'd actually cried with me - it made my heart warm dangerously.

"You don't have to finish" He finally says and his hands cup my face, wiping the tears off. I let him but I shake my head in his hands.

"No - I said I'd finish it. So as long as you don't feel burdened... I'll finish." I say, shrugging weakly. Maybe he didn't want to deal with my crying anymore.

His small smile eases the knot on my chest slightly and I continue as he wraps his arms back around me. I lay my head on his right shoulder and cuddle up to him. If I was going to say this next part I would at least take advantage of being in his arms for this short amount of time.

"Well back to what I was saying - my mum had no friends she would go out with or meet with for the longest time until, one day, she got invited to her school reunion and there she met with a couple of her old good friends. A woman and a man. The man was newly divorced and the woman was in a relationship but not married. My mum was happy to reconnect and became close to both of them but my dad wasn't happy with my mum meeting with them and even accused her of wanting to cheat on him with the man which was far from the truth. Countless nights followed with my dad arriving late and shouting at my mum and brother. Then my brother was gone to uni so it was just us three. It went on and it got worse and worse. Later in life, I found out that drugs were also involved by that point. I was around twelve at the time of the restraining order. The first bad experience leading up to it was when my my dad came home shouting at my mum one night. I was the wild card - daddys girl. That night my brother was already in uni and as they fought I listened from the second floor by the stairs. When it got louder and my started sounding hysterical I heard a loud crash and my mum scream and I knew it was time for me to step in - so I ran down."

I am scarily calm as I talk about this part. The sobbing has halted and Luca is rocking me gently, listening quietly. I lick my lips, "I-I  saw glass crashed on the far left side of the room and my mum staring at my dad wide eyed with tears flowing down her cheeks. That was the first day I lost it. I shouted at him asking him what he thought he was doing. I asked him if he thought it was normal and screamed at him telling him what I thought of him. He slapped me - not too hard but it was a slap. My mum screamed and my dad stood still - shocked at what he'd done I suppose. It wasn't a slap I deserved but a loss of control on my dad's behalf and his regret was immediately evident. I was the only one that didn't bat an eye. I asked him 'did you really just slap me?' but he insisted he didn't mean to. So I repeated if he thought this scene he was creating was normal in any way and I sent my dad to his room." An almost hysterical chuckle escapes me - "Can you picture that?" The question is rhetorical and he doesn't say anything but I had felt his hands clench tightly on my back.