How Can You Be So Trusting?

Chapter 31 - Janus

Janus' P.O.V
Though for the last chapter: LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR-
Tw: suicidal thought? And I'm pretty sure i probaly wrote an anxiety attack so watch out for that as well.

The cold floor hit harshly againest my body. I scrambled somewhere, I don't know where, picking up the pieces of my broken heart along the way.

I was now somewhere. Or nowhere. Nowhere that anyone would care anyway.

I held myself in my own arms silently sobbing to myself through the warmth of my tears, "It's al-alright...it's alr-alright....it-it's alr-r-ight....I-it's al-alr-right...." I clung onto the cold embrace of my empty lies trying to decieve not only myself but everyone around me.

"I-i-m al-alr-right...I-i...I'm a-alri-ri-right..."

All of it will be gone. Everything from birth to now, gone. Everything I've owned, everything I've experienced, all reduced to mere ashes.

Falling ceiling fueled it's raging tantrum making the child grow older and more twisted by society's words of supposed wisedom.

My stomach twisted and turned, sqelched and screamed for only I to hear. My insides screamed and moaned in agony. My throat felt dry and pinched together by the overwhelming pressure as a figure of everything that had came before.

He held me high by my neck.

I can't breathe.

I can't breathe.

I can't breathe.

I can't breathe.

I can't breathe.

I can't breathe.

I can't breathe.

I can't breathe!

I CAN'T BREATHE!

I gasped and begged for air.

I couldn't feel my lungs filling up, the numbness of all the pain spread around killing it all but the memories within.

"MOM!"
"I WANT MY MOM BACK"

I choked on every word fighting the pain with every sound coming from my mouth.

My own tears began drowing me in their salty liquid, my own salty liquid.

I felt my throat burning me from within as my heart pounded and pounded againest my chest, wanting to escape it all.

Is this the pain Roman felt. Is this what he went through? Is this what was so hard to stand? I know now...

He was so brave...going through all that.

"MOM!" My pained scream echoed across nowhere going to somewhere, reaching someone, reaching anyone.

My mother looked at me and I nodded in agreement. My mother was just as kind as her sister but was way stricker than Aunt Nayomi. She kind of scared me.

My fingers dug themselves into the arms that I used to hold her with, the arms that pushed her away, the arms that held her hand.

I felt the pain bouncing of the walls in my brain. Crack. Crack. Crack.

"MOM! WHY'D YOU LEAVE ME HERE?!" My yelp in pain felt real. Like a knife slicing into my heart, into my life, leaving but a tiny slither of happiness behind.

"Why is that any of your business?" My mother glared at her without blinking as she spoke.

"There may be something wrong with your boy," Me and Logan just watched the scene play out and since he couldn't identify most emtional things.

"Maybe there something wrong with you?" She snarled as if a lioness tring to protect her cub.

"Madam, can you please calm down," The nurse requested. This will just make things worse. Never, and I repeat, never ask my mother to calm down ever.

"Then dont judge people from so little you know about them!" She began to raise her voice a bit at the nurse. She does have a point but she doesn't need to yell at someone to prove her point. It's kind of scary to watch.

"MOM!"

Rattle.
Rattle.
Rattle.

"JA-JANUS?!" Someone cried from somewhere.

WHERE AM I?

MOM HELP ME!

YOU CAN HELP ME!

YOU CAN!

I KNOW IT!

MOM, I NEED YOU!

But no help came.

End Of Chapter. 655 Words.