Islamic Stories,Rays of Sunshine

Life Battles

*LIFE BATTLES*
*Fought by brave, young girls.*

Welcome to _Story #2_ of Banaatul Ummahs weekly motivation from the real life stories of young girls, facing major challenges.

This week, we look through the life story of of our young warrior, Nabeela. (names have been changed to maintain privacy)

See life through the eyes of a young girl, facing many emotional challenges and how she struggles to cope, without much support from us, the community.
While we may not know Nabeela, remember there are many more Nabeelas out there, who need our support, love and our Duas.

May Allah shower our youth with His guidance, love, forgiveness and mercy and may Allah grant our youth steadfastness on Deen. آمين.

Enjoy!

*SEARCHING FOR MY RAINBOW, IN THE DARKEST STORM*

(Reading time +- 5 min)

I haven't spoken about this to anyone for years, because some things are better left exactly where they are, and that is, in the past. Unless, of course, an opportunity comes our way, when it can be used as an inspiration or an upliftment for one single person. So, I was asked to touch on the events of my life, regrets I have and how I've overcome the countless hurdles. Honesty, what could've taken me a mere 5 minutes to type out, is actually taking me days. To think of where to start from and which part of my life to focus on is much harder than I thought it would be.

As a teenager, I was modern and outgoing, with a big mouth that got me into more trouble than I needed. But, I felt unaccepted at home for many years. I tried my best at everything I did, but it was never good enough. I was always criticized. I reached a point of frustration and rejection and I eventually had enough of trying to win over my family's love and attention, so I decided to search for it in other places- all the wrong places. I turned to music, as my way of blocking out the rejection. I adored actresses and singers and chose them as my role models. And boys, of course, for love and attention. For a while, it felt amazing. I loved being out there, because I finally felt accepted and I was the centre of attention. But how long did that kind of happiness and satisfaction last? Well, it didn't...

Until the day, Allah chose me. At the age of 15, it was Allah who turned my confused and deviated heart. I believe it was someone's dua for me, and until today, I wonder whose. But, coming from extreme modernism- partying, fornication and revealing clothes; I, overnight, had a change of heart. You see, it was the school holidays and I was bored and grounded as usual. I had nothing to do, so I picked up a book which was lying around regarding the wives and daughters of Naby صلى الله عليه وسلم. After reading it, I cried and cried with regret at the life I was leading. The thought came to my mind, that if the wives and daughters of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم, who were so pure, chaste and innocent, were instructed to cover their faces, then who am I? I tossed and turned the entire night, thinking about going into Niqaab. The thought of what everyone would say haunted me. By the morning, I had come to a conclusion that if I died now, what other people thought about me would not matter. It is only what Allah thought about me that will matter. I will be alone in my grave and no one else will be there to answer for me. And so, without having a single niqaab in my house and owning just one abayah, which was kept in case there was a funeral in the family, I made a decision to go into Niqaab.

As expected, there was chaos and unrest in my home, once again. Things like: "I should wait for a while, before making such a drastic decision" and, "Slowly, slowly one step at a time," they told me. But, I was adamant. So, for the rest of my holiday, I tied my scarf around my face whenever I left my home, much to my family's dismay. And that was the beginning of my very long journey.