Langst - Klance oneshots

Prisoner 2

Trigger warnings: blood, cutting, burning, the want to self harm

...

I wake up, gasping. Frantically I look around only to be met with nothingness. Completely black. I slowly get up and freeze. Wait. What the fuck? I should be hella sore. But I'm not. Huh. I look and feel the way I did before I got captured. I am fine. Physically at least. I'm not sure I can ever be okay mentally again. Not fully at least.

Suddenly, a bright white light flashes before me. I shield my eyes, but when I lower my hands, I am speechless. All around me are juniberries, Allura's favorite flower. On days where she misses Altea severely, she comes to me and simply talks. I listen, of course. I will always be there for my team. Allura walks towards me with a face I couldn't really decipher. When my initial shock disappears, I run towards her for a hug. "Allura!" I cry out in joy. She holds up a hand to stop me.

In a calm threatening voice she speaks. "If you would have listened to directions and followed the plan like everyone else you wouldn't be here right now." "Wh-what?" I whimper. "You heard me." She says harshly. "Strategically, it would be better to leave you here and let you rot. You are a disgrace to Voltron," she now sports a cold smile. "You're just a stand in for the true blue paladin. Me." She spins on her heel and walks away.

No. They won't leave me here, right? No... no...please. They're taking Blue away from me. I'm sorry I was never good enough. The scene begins to melt away like sloppy, wet paint. In my state, the image is even more disturbing. I'm now standing in the middle of the lounge. Pidge and I love to talk about whatever here. A no judgement zone. It's also where I drag her from her computers. I smile faintly at the memories.

"This isn't a game, Lance." I hear behind me. I jerk around to find Pidge. She has her hands on her hips and she radiates disgust. "You never stop fooling around. You got your ass in this situation." She starts walking away. The last thing I hear from her is "Get your own worthless ass outta this fucked up mess."

Is that what they think? I got caught in order to shove Kieth out of the closing door. Only one of us could safely make it out. It had to be Kieth.

But... she's right. This is my fault. I deserve this. I deserve all the pain and torture. It's my fault. The universe is better off without me. And I've known this from day one. But oh, how much more it hurts when someone you loved and trusted, confirms your uselessness. Tears fill my eyes. It feels like my heart has been stomped on. I sink to my knees.

I hear a familiar set of heavy footsteps. "Hunk?" I croak out. "Stop your pity party." He sneers. "B-but, you have always been with me!" I sob. "Whenever I was down, you'd cheer me up! You got me through the darkest part of my depression! You convinced me not to commit suicide! You're my best bud!" By now I was ugly sobbing. Tears, snot, the whole shebang. He just grew more annoyed. "Ugh. Why can't you get it through your head? Do I need to spell it out for you? We. Don't God. Damn. Care. About. You. I only cheered you up because otherwise it'll affect Voltron." "No... you care about me. You saved me. You're like my brother!" At this point, I'm trying to convince myself more than him. "You were always a burden." He says.

Hunk... you were my savior. You saved my life on several occasions. You got me help. I showed you the darkest parts of me. No...

I sit on my calves. All of a sudden, I feel as if my skull is being cracked apart. Over and over, mini sledgehammers pound into my head. I hold my head in my hands. It hurts. Oh, but I deserve it. I deserve every single second of this pain. I deserve to fucking die. I want to fucking die. My wrists become itchy. My long nails scratch at them. It hurts. But that's what I want. I keep picking at my skin till it's red and raw. I scratch until a bead of blood comes. Oh. So that's what I want. That's what I need,