I'm Not Dead Yet...

Chapter 9

Back to Reena's POV:
I watched Jason stand over the girl that hurt Emma, looking at her face, his eyes focused on the ugly bullet hole in her head. I should check on Emma, I thought sadly, if it wasn't for me she would be alive, I should have signalled to kill her earlier, should've won't bring her back, I thought bitterly, "is Emma alive?" I asked Caitlin,
"Barely," she replied,
"Will she live?" My throat tightened as uncertainty clouded Caitlin's gaze,
"I don't know," she said finally, "but Reena, if she doesn't, you can't fall apart. We consider you a leader." I nodded and turned away, me? A leader, they've placed their faith on the wrong person.

"Leave me be!" I yelled at jai,
"You were screaming!" He defended,
"In my sleep! How the hell was I supposed to know!?" My patience had grown short when he woke me up, all romantic feelings for him vanished when he woke me up this morning,
"Ree, Sam's accident wrecked you, you need to talk to someone, and I'm right here. He sobbed,
"Her accident!? Don't talk about her like she's still alive, because she's dead!" I spat bitterly,
"Stop pitying yourself, it will only make it worse." He said gently,
"Shut up! You have no idea what I'm doing! You hardly even know me! And self-pity is one of the many things I hate more than you!" Jai looked hurt, thank god, I thought, maybe now he'll leave, unfortunately, I wasn't that lucky.
"I know that you don't hate me." He scoffed,
"Do you? Things have changed since that! Many, many things!" The truth was I didn't like Jai that way anymore, but I have taken a liking to Jason, he is sweet, nice and doesn't assume things he doesn't know.
"You don't like me that way anymore?" He was hurt, I heard it in his cracking voice, the way the words sounded high and tight,
"No, and I don't know if I ever actually did." Tears shone in his eyes but they were refusing to roll down his cheeks, I know I have a habit of wanting something, then when I can have it I change my mind. I've figured sometimes you just want something you can't have, then when you can have it, you don't want it, horrible habits.
"Who do you want then?" He asked, audibly swallowing his anger and hurt, I felt bad, that's also part of the habit, damn me, I thought sourly, can I live a day without hurting someone in some way?!

I felt more comfortable in my black t-shirt and jeans, sure it got hot sometimes but as it was either late may to early June I was fine, it's hard to tell seeing as there are no calendars and all technology is pretty stuffed. Some of the others had began to wear jumpers but what's the point? To be perfectly honest I've never felt the cold, even at the ski fields I sweated, and my theory is that the thinner jumper you wear, the more heat your body produces, so you are hotter. I know my theory doesn't have much behind it but I never said you had to think it works. (So to all those people at school who complain, suck on that! This is the reason!!). I do have to be thankful that it doesn't snow here though, that crap is horrible without the right things to use, like the wrong shoes. Trust me, I've tried, a silent prayer to my sneakers, may you rest in peace. As I walked back to camp holding the clothes that I've worn for the last day and night, I saw Caitlin, felicity and Hannah crowding around Emma. Holy crap she better not die, I thought as I ran to see what was happening, "what's going on?" I asked, my lungs burned as I realised I'd been holding my breath, no one answered, and they didn't need to as Emma began to cough. Scarlet drops of blood splattered the leaf litter next to her, and she rolled onto her side, I fell to my knees beside her and felt hot, wet tears streamed down my cheeks as I tried to save her but as her skin grew cold beneath my fingers I knew she had passed.
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Okay, I hope this answered some questions, and once again, ITS FICTION. This chapter was still quite short and I'm sorry, also another recommendation: WANT
WANT is fantastic and I loved it.
Ummmmmm... Any questions are welcome! I love you all!!😻😻 (maybe not all *cough* CaitlinHogan, jk)
-Kate