This is a TOTGA story.
If i could live my life differently, i will definitely start from high school. As high spirited and tactless and rebellious i was, my life from that stage is a series of bad choices, poor selection of peers (except my true bestfriends sila lang talaga ang tamang desisyon sa buhay ko), and worst belief that i am capable of making decisions on my own.
Ang maganda sana kung na realize ko kaagad na pagkatapos ng mga pagkakamali ko, ginamit ko iyong basehan para wag nang maulit pa. Ang kaso matigas talaga ang ulo ko. Immature and with overflowing pride, ipinagpatuloy ko pa rin.
The result is disastrous.
And here i am, attending the reunion party with nothing to offer on my plate. I am undergraduate, no career, with three mkids, and ive got a cheating husband for myself.
I am looking at some of my close friends who have stable careers. Classmates na nakaka zero sa quizes pero mukhang bigatin na ngayon. Yung mga ini snob ko lang noon, mga engineers na ngayon. May architect. Maraming teachers. May nakapag asawa ng foreigner at ubod na ng yaman. Some of them migrated and are working in the US or NZ or Canada at umuwi lang sa Pilipinas para umattend sa reunion party ng high school.
Meaning, ako lang talaga ang walang maipagyayabang.
Samantalang matalino ako. Malakas ang loob. Madiskarte. Smart din daw. What could have happened?
Ang edge ko na lang siguro, i was able to maintain my physical attributes. Hindi katulad nila na ang tataba na at karamihan napabayaan na ang katawan mula ng mag asawa. Ako, mukha pa ring teenager sa hitsura ko. Maganda ang damit and take note bagay sa akin. Hindi kami mayaman pero hindi ako papakabog sa kanila.
Mukha pa rin akong expensive.
And before the bitterness consumed the whole of me, umalis na ako.
May kaunting inggit pero hindi ko sila tuluyang ma blame for what happened in my life. Im sure they go thru hell and back to achieve whatever they have right now. All of us have stories to tell.
No one to blame but myself. Why?
What did it go wrong?
Nakaupo ako sa harap ng manibela pero hindi ko magawang paandarin ang sasakyan.
And before i knew it, nag uunahang pumatak mula sa mga mata ko ang luha.
