Wild (Cherik Book One)

Barely Holding On

"I'm undone. I'm bout to burst at my seams."

_____CHARLIE: ONE YEAR AGO____
Charlie woke up to the screaming of both his alarm and his sister in the shower. Her new girlfriend, Marina, had gotten her hooked on a new artist and their record had been on repeat in every room of the house for the past month. Charlie knew it wasn't about the music but more that Marina was connected to it. Charlie didn't mind all that much, he was glad to finally see his sister's cold exterior melt away. She deserved that happiness and Marina was nice and her friend Angel was good company. Charlie's hand hit the alarm begrudgingly and with a colossal yawn that left him breathless he stood up. Mornings in the Xavier household were unlike others. For one, they live in a mansion so mornings consisted of maids doing morning work and preparing breakfast for Charlie's parents as well as himself and Raven. There was lots of walking involved which Charlie was grateful for considering how long it took him to really wake up in the mornings. There was also a certain fairytale quality about it all, but Charlie never admitted he saw it that way. The actions of the maids pushing back the curtains to reveal a rising and bright sun on the large hill of isolation was all very whimsical. The way the birds chirped on the tree outside Charlie's window with the small paper cranes hanging around his ceiling were storybook worthy. This sort of thinking is what often got him into trouble.
Colonel Brian Xavier was a complicated man with a complicated past. He held values and expectations of his only given son that stressed the boy out tremendously. He wanted Charlie to be the picture of manhood that he was at that age. He almost always had a problem with the way Charlie dressed, talked and most of all how much he cared. And it wasn't like Sharon Xavier was much better, she'd been sped off a silver spoon the entirety of her life and would do anything to keep that lifestyle afloat. She was hopelessly oblivious to the mental abuse Charles was constantly under. All of this and more were precisely why Charles had left his big secret. There was no way he was going to tell his dad that he was gay. He had seen what their reaction was when Ben and Leo came out together. And Lord knows if that's any consolation to how they would act about him he was fine with keeping that part of himself hidden. Sometimes Raven or Marina would be convincing enough to get Charlie to have fun with makeup but never when his parents were in town. Everything was hidden, suppressed and ignored. So, Charlie stuck to stolen kisses from boys at parties and ignored the ache for something true. Not that that was any easier considering the fact that he was seriously crushing on a certain skater boy. Charlie groaned and put on his mask for the day. The mask to keep his dad satisfied and his mom oblivious. The mask he wore in front of everyone...well almost everyone.
Charlie hummed along to the familiar song playing from his sisters room. He almost debated pretending to be sick and just not going to school. No one would really even notice but then he wouldn't see his friends. His friends who are the only constant in a sea of variables. So, Charlie went to his bathroom and began his tedious morning routine. Another thing the Xavier household runs on is his father's failure to let go of the military intricacy of everything. The smallest details down to a science, it drove Charlie crazy. After wrapping it up Charlie went to his closet to pick out something to wear. The school year was ending soon so the weather was heating up. His usual attire of a sweater and jeans wasn't going to cut it on a day getting up to ninety. He shuffled through his shirts until he came across a plain white shirt with an abstract face on it. Pairing it with a pair of skinny jeans and a belt he threw on a yellow jacket and left his room.
"I know, I'm running late!" She shouted and Charlie shrugged before heading downstairs. The mornings consisted of a heavily scripted conversation with his parents that didn't hold too much weight beyond the normal questions. Sophia, their maid, was setting the table for breakfast as she hurried about. Sitting at the table in his monarch-like glory was the man himself. Speckles of gray popped through his dark hair like salt and pepper. His eyes cast down to today's newspaper. He didn't acknowledge his son with anything but a nod. Charlie's father always did prefer his sister but that didn't bother Charlie. The less criticism from his father the better.
"Looks delicious Sophia," Charlie smiles warmly to the woman who sent a loving wink his way. He carefully dug into the small pile of waffles on his plate. He waited in silence to see if his father had any problems for the day but none came. The silence was deafening until Raven came barreling down the staircase in an old band shirt and leggings. Her fire red hair pulled back in a loose ponytail. She looked stunning but Raven has a natural beauty. She rarely ever had to try to look good. This frustrated Charlie greatly.
"Come on," Raven picked up waffle and gave their father a kiss on the cheek. Charlie opted for a small farewell wave and raced after his sister to the beaten up "Loser Cruiser".
The ride to school is longer than others due to where they live. There's several back roads that can cut a good ten minutes but Charlie wasn't in a hurry to get to school. Something told him today was going to suck and the last thing he wanted was to spend more time at school. So, he rolled down the windows and blasted his and Ravens favorite songs. It was absolutely freeing to be himself. To be away from his father's eye rolls and scoffs.
"I'm sorry about dad," Ravens voice broke the silence between songs and Charlie frowned.
"What about him?"
"That he's an asshole all the time. You're perfect just the way you are," Raven smiled sweetly and Charlie shrugged.
"I mean I do act ridiculous sometimes and maybe I shouldn't care so much. And I dress like a very gay teenager despite me trying so hard to hide it. He's right about some stuff," Charlie's voice wandered off to a darker place as he found himself making up for his dad's morning silence with his own self criticism.
"Charles Xavier! You are perfect and wonderful and dad can kick rocks because one day we are all gonna get out of here and be famous or some shit. Or travel and live in a van together. I don't...I don't want to hear you talk like that," Raven got upset and held Charlie's hand to squeeze it.
"Whatever, don't get all soft now because you've got a girlfriend who's cooler than you," Charlie teased and Raven giggled with a small blush before licking her palm and slapping Charlie's cheek. This earned a scream and scowl from the boy and Raven went into a fit of laughter.
"You're disgusting," Charlie mumbles and Raven nodded in agreement.
___
If Charlie had known what was waiting for him at school he would have gone home. He would have worn a sweatshirt and maybe cleaned off the peeling polish on his nails. He would have been more careful, less...obvious. But he didn't know and he wasn't prepared for what awaited him. There's a cruelty in that. The moments before someone's life gets ripped apart. Charlie had a naive innocence that was taken from him that day. Stolen in the worst of ways.
Charlie parked in his usual spot and yawned as he turned off the yellow vehicle. He checked his hair in the mirror as he always did before getting out.
"Rav, come on," Charlie knocked on her window as she applied her lip gloss. A tinge of jealousy went through him but he pushed it far away. She stuck her tongue out and grabbed her backpack before getting out as well. Raven began going on and on about Marina as the two approached the front double doors. They passed a few students whose eyes lingered a little too long on Charlie but he brushed it off.
After splitting away from his sister Charlie headed to his own locker. Music played in his headphones as he walked rubbing the straps of his bag in thought. About what it would be like to be himself or be somewhere so far from here. Somewhere millions of miles away from his parents and these decaying roots. Or what it would be like to kiss Er—
"Hey, pretty boy wanna smooch!" A boy from Charlie's math class shoved him and made a mocking kissing face. Charlie looked at him in confusion as they all laughed and kept walking.
"Charlie! Oh thank God," Leo suddenly gripped Charlie's arm and dragged him into the empty hallway as the students began clearing out. Charlie yelped in surprise and took his headphones off.
"You scared me, what's wrong?" Charlie frowned as Leo looked at him. It was a strange look, one of panic and sympathy and the truest sadness. His big doe eyes closed for a moment before returning to meet Charlie's.
"Let me, uh crap, okay let me tell everyone I found you," Leo took out his phone and sent a rapidly typed text.
"Leo, what's wrong? What happened?" Charlie began to feel that knowing pit in his stomach spread. The feeling that something awful happened. And what had those boys been going on about?
"Let's get somewhere more quiet," Leo took Charlie's hand. Charlie has known Leo for years and while he almost always was holding  Charlie's hand it was never like this. There was a slight tremble in his palm as he guided Charlie back out into the parking lot. No one stopped them, not caring about them both. But Charlie was growing in both worry and confusion as they went and sat in the bed of Ben's truck. There, they waited five minutes before everyone was running out of the school and towards them. Ben, Alex, Darwin, Hank, Sean, Erik, Raven, Marina and even Angel. They were talking about something but Erik's eyes met Charlie's and didn't leave them once. There was an apology on his lips and his eyes were buzzing wild with emotion.
"Erik what happened?" Charlie asked. Erik swallowed thickly and put two comforting hands on Charlie's shoulders.
"Okay...somebody, we don't know who yet, got pictures of you kissing someone at Leslie's party last weekend. And they took those pictures and posted them everywhere with a lot of things to say with it," Erik spoke softly and almost near a whisper. It didn't register at first. Nothing about the statement rang an alarm until Charlie's brain caught up. Pictures and kissing...Charlie's ears began ringing. He began to feel as if the earth below him had sunk and he couldn't stop falling. He knew exactly who it was and most importantly that it was a boy he had been vigorously making out with on a drunken decision. He didn't remember a lot from that night but the ghost of sweet beer stained lips on his own now remained. As well as the butterflies and the feeling that everything will be okay. But now that memory is corrupted into something hot and sour like sewage water. Charlie was disgusted with himself. He should have known.
Charlie scrambled to his feet as panic struck his usually serene features. Everyone knew...that's why they all stare.
"Erik," Charlie grasped onto him for support as he squeezed his eyes shut.
"Charlie we got it taken down," Erik assured letting his best friend shiver and grip onto his flannel.
"But not quick enough! Everyone knows now! What am I going to do?! What if my dad finds out? Holy shit what if my dad finds out? He will kill me Erik, he really will!" Charlie felt hot desperate tears stream down his fearful cheeks. Because he wasn't lying. His father terrified him and to imagine what he would do if he found out his son was gay was horrifying. The prospect of being kicked out or rejected was something Charlie couldn't handle. He loved his family, despite everything. Sure his dad was kind of an asshole and his mom was an alcoholic stepford wife but still they were it for him. He had been so careful! He was a different boy when around his parents just like Raven was a different girl. But he drank too much and did things that he wouldn't normally do sober. And now he's really screwed up. Erik remained calm and collected as he held Charlie in a hug. Everyone was silent, the world was watching them all.
"Hey, hey I won't let anything bad happen to you, okay?" Erik whispered into his ear but Charlie was too far away to really hear his words.
"It's going to be so bad Erik. It's going to be so bad," Charlie repeated into his wet shirt.
"We are all going to make sure you're okay. No more walking alone, okay? Charlie you are so loved by so many," Erik places a soft kiss on Charlie's coffee stain curls. The warmth made Charlie shiver but he ignored it.
"And the football team wouldn't dare speak bad about you Charlie. You're the reason they are passing their classes," Alex added a light chuckle in hope of lifting Charlie's spirits. It didn't help, nothing helped besides the scent of detergent and fading aroma of cigarettes in Erik's flannel. Nothing helped but the strong lanky arms that wrapped around him like a protector.
"I'm done for," Charlie's voice was down to a depressing whisper as he slowly retreated from Erik's hold. It was true. Charlie knew that the bullying he'd just gotten used to was going to increase tenfold. He knew black eyes were going to become a part of his everyday attire. He knew that derogatory comments were going to be his new music. And most of all he knew that the fire and flame in his father's fist was going to be nothing short of familiar. His life, his hectic lovely life, was over as he knew it.
"Hey, don't talk like that. Please, I'll protect you from whatever shit is coming your way. You are not alone in this." Erik hugged Charlie again and held him tightly letting the steady beating of his heart relax Charlie. And it did after awhile. Charlie's muscles relaxed and his mind cleared up.
"I don't want..." Charlie couldn't finish. He didn't want to be at school but he sure as hell didn't want to go home either.
"Let's go get ice cream," Erik put his arm around Charlie. The rest of the group waited for Charlie's smile of approval and when it came a series of hollers followed.
Everyone knew what this meant for Charlie. This town was cruel and now they were in the thick of it. Not that anyone cared, they would stand up for Charlie in every way possible. A quality especially tested in the following weeks. When the bullying started it was a whole new breed of cruel. It was mocking gestures, foul names and fist fights. It was like Hell at first. The staring and whispering from his classmates. Everyone wasn't discreet about it either but Charlie just kept his head down and did his schoolwork. School was out in a few weeks and Charlie knew that meant it would get worse. Jacob and his goons would make his life hell because they could. Because he was an easy target.
Not to mention his parents had conveniently gone on a business trip after finding out. His father acted as expected and Charlie still gets shivers when he remembers the look in his father's eyes. A wicked mix of disgust and disappointment. It had crushed Charlie, but he supposed his father was cooling down in Las Vegas so he wasn't complaining. In fact he hadn't spoken in awhile. Charlie was recoiling into himself more and more everyday. He hated it but it was safe.
Another week passed and Charlie was speeding to his locker to avoid bullies. He just wanted to get to English. But fate had other plans.
"Charlie, right?" A voice appeared beside his locker and he looked up to the owner. Charlie's cheeks flushed pink at the cheeky smile the stranger was giving him. He was tall and built like he was an athlete but by his attitude Charlie had a feeling he wasn't. He held some code against jocks or something. His dirty blonde hair was slicked back giving way to his grey blue eyes that enticed and enchanted Charlie. And by God he was tall too. The kind of tall you could just curl into on a Sunday aft—
"Anyone ever tell you staring was rude?" The stranger chuckled lightly and Charlie cursed himself.
"Yes, uh sorry, it's just no one really talks to me anymore," Charlie swallows thickly and gets his books.
"Silly thing isn't it? They all treat you like shit why? Because you realized the universal truth that guys are way cuter than girls?" He leaned on the lockers in the most James Dean way. Charlie felt like a schoolgirl as he smirked.
"Anyway, I'm Jack. I just wanted to give you this...I'll see you later blue eyes," Jack put a scrap piece of paper in Charlie's sweaty palm and backed away with a smile. Charlie started after him as he looked down at the paper.

I think you're one hell of a cutie blue eyes and I'd love to take you skating this weekend. Call me: (111)-222-3333

Charlie clutched the paper and felt heat rise into his cheeks. And for the rest of the day Charlie held his head a bit higher.
~~~~~~
Necessary backstory to the incident that I refer to often. One year ago this happened and that's when Charlie had to get a lot tougher. Also, a little origin for Jack and Charlie meeting.
Anygays, thank you for reading and I appreciate the support!

Have a lovely day/night!!<3 *Bisexual finger guns*