Beautiful people // Ethan Dolan (2)

On The Road

"Mama missed her snuggle butt." I said walking through the front door, straight to the bouncer up pick up my four month old and cuddling him to my chest.

"Sometimes I just want to quit my job and stay here with you all day bubs." I said walking over to the couch and sitting down. "Did you and dada have fun?"

"Tons of it," Ethan said walking in from the kitchen. "We ate breakfast, went to see uncle Gray, went shopping, took a couple of naps, ate some more, and did tummy time."

He kissed the top of my head before walking back into the kitchen. "What do you want for dinner Love?"

"Anything is fine." I sighed, turning my attention back to the baby. "I really do love you so so much Elias. I hope you know that. Mama doesn't want to leave you everyday, but I hope one day you'll understand I have to."

"Babe, he knows that." Ethan said, listening in from the kitchen. "And he knows that you are changing the world one tiny mind at a time. And trust me, he's just as proud of you as I am."

I woke up and looked around, scratching my head and grabbing my phone, checking the time. 7:40am.

That is three nights in a row now that I have dreamed of having a kid with Ethan, and it's starting to freak me out. I stood up off the bed, stopping by my dresser to get an undergarment and a towel, and walked towards the bathroom and turned on the shower.

I took off the t-shirt and underwear that I was wearing before stepping under the water.

As the water was hitting me, I couldn't help but wonder what my subconscious was trying to tell me. I know 100% for a fact that I'm not pregnant, because it's been almost three months now since me and Ethan have had sex and I've had my period three times since then.

Maybe my brain is trying to tell me to get over myself and have sex with my boyfriend again. But that doesn't make sense. Or maybe, my moms gotten into my head again and her constant nagging for a grandkid has ingrained itself in my brain.

But that still doesn't explain why it's been the exact same dream three days in a row. I come home from work, pick up the baby, and then start crying because I feel like I should be at home with him instead of working.

Maybe it's the fact that I do, in fact, really want a baby and have wanted one for a long time, and I've just been suppressing it.

I sighed and turned the water off, stepping out of the shower, grabbing my towel and wrapping it around my body. I put on my undergarments and stood there and brushed my hair out before putting leave in conditioner in it and walking back out to my room.

"You took long enough in there."

"Jesus Christ." I said, jumping back, not expecting anyone to be in my bedroom. "How the fuck did you get in here Ethan?"

"Spare key," he said, shrugging.

"And you didn't think to tell me that you were coming over?" I asked, walking over to my closet to grab something to wear. I took out a pair of jean shorts and pulled them on, leaning them unbuttoned so I could tuck my tank top into them.

"I wanted to surprise you." He said and I fumbled my tank top over my head trying to avoid my hair and then buttoning my shorts.

"More like give me a heart attack." I mumbled. "It's only like 8am, why are you even awake?"

"Because we've got to get on the road soon."

I turned around to look at him and he had a sneaky grin on his face.