A Mother's Bond

59

Beyoncé  November 1, 2016
I bit the tip of my pen, furrowing my eyebrows in concentration. The words on the webpage ran together, a blur of information. I sighed, kneading my temples. How was I supposed to know which one was the right choice?

A knock sounded on my door, interrupting my thoughts. I looked up from my laptop, seeing Jay's head peaking in. The pressure in my chest faded away as he smiled at me.

"I saw your light on," he half-heartedly explained.

I raised an eyebrow, the hint of a smile on my lips. "You saw my laptop light from the other end of the hall?"

Jay scrunched his face up, before chuckling. He shrugged and walked into the room, running his hand over his head.

"Yeah, I guess that was a shitty excuse, huh?"

I nodded, a smirk on my face as Jay made himself comfortable beside me. Even going so far as to glance over at my laptop. I watched him out of the corner of my eye.

"What are you doing?"

He looked up from my laptop, the picture of innocence. "Huh?"

I laughed, taking off my reading glasses to look at him. "I said, what are you doing?"

"I'm doing what you're doing," he explained, gesturing at my screen.

"You're doing what I'm doing?" I repeated.

"That's what I said."

"Oh okay," I said, smiling slightly. "So, what am I doing?"

"Uh–you're–" He took a breath through his teeth.

"Yeah, that's what I thought," I said, turning back to my laptop. "I'm researching the rehab centers Dr. Hanna suggested.

Jay took the opportunity to scoot over, getting all in my space as he leaned down to read what was on my laptop. I smirked down at the back of his head. I knew damn well what he was doing. He was not slick.

Since our separation, I hadn't really let Jay near me. We had a few moments here and there when it seemed like we were getting back to where we used to be. But for the most part, we'd kept things on a friendship level. Jay had been respectful of my decision. He'd stayed in the guest room like he'd promised. He didn't approach me unless it involved the kids. He'd been the perfect roommate. Until recently.

Jay had been getting a little bold lately. Testing the waters. I liked to give him a hard time about it, but honestly, I liked it. I missed him just as much as he missed me. Not that I'd ever let him know. I wanted him to work for my trust. Show me that he was going to be in this with me 100%, because Lord knows if he pulled that shit again, I would be bouncing my way to the next man.

Jay sat up straight, staying close to me. "Yeah, I was looking at this rehab center too."

I raised my eyebrow. "Oh yeah? What did you think?"

I didn't believe for a second that he'd gone out of his way to research the rehabs on his own. Dr. Hanna had sent us both the list, but Jay had always left the bulk of the parenting to me. He'd probably glanced at the list and passed it off to an assistant to choose the best one.

Jay rubbed his chin as if he was really thinking about it. I supressed the urge to roll my eyes.

"Well," he started. "I think it's the best option."

I rolled my eyes in earnest. I knew he was going to say that shit. Mindlessly agreeing with whatever I had to say to fool me into thinking–

"They have Dr. Ramirez on their team," he continued, surprising me. "From what I've read, she's one of the best therapists out there. She even specialized in recovery therapy for addicts. Plus, this place has a great physical rehabilitation program. They have this physiotherapist named Ryan Dubois. I looked into her. She's tough, but she seems cool. She might not admit it, ever, but I think Sarayah will really like her."