Theirs to Claim (Under minor editing)

Chapter 8

"Mind if I join you, babe?"

"Uhm... no. But you know, if you want to, you can go ahead of me."

I don't know if I'm just seeing things, but I think I saw Trey's face contort into anger for a second before he pouted. I shake my head. I'm probably just tired from the party.

I touch Trey's pouted lips with a finger, tapping at it. "This won't get you there, mister." I say, joking.

"Well, you can go ahead of me. I'll just rest for a while." He leaves a kiss on my forehead before walking towards the bed.

I enter the bathroom, close the door and lock it. Beaten by paranoia, I check whether the knob is surely locked for about six times. I know I said I've already forgiven Trey; but, it still bothers me sometimes. I'm already doing well with kissing, but I still freeze and experience panic attacks whenever Trey touches the back of my hair or my thighs. That's the reason why, I have always put my hair in a bun since then. He's adjusted to it and avoids touching me in those places.

They say true forgiveness is when you can blot the offense of the person you have forgiven out of your system. Therefore, resetting your trust in that person. It's hard to say, and most definitely harder to do. I might have forgiven him... but I have yet to truly forget what he did.

I hop out of my clothes and step in the shower.

Once I'm done, I wear my underwear, sweat pants, and oversized t-shirt. Ever since then, I have always brought my change of clothes together with me in the shower. I have also developed love for sweat pants and oversized t-shirts.

I realize I hadn't completely turn the shower off. Before I can turn it off, I hear Trey moan "fuck yeah", making me freeze. It's loud enough for me to hear, despite my lack of the superior hearing capability of lupis. The room is soundproof for sure; but, it isn't against the bathroom door inside it.

I start trembling and my heart starts palpitating. I begin feeling nauseas. I feel like choking. Unwelcomed tears rage on as I fall on the floor. I can feel my heart thumping louder and louder. The pulsation reverberates all throughout my body.

"Babe, are you okay? I can hear your heartbeat and breathing." Trey pounds on the door.

"I-I'm fine." I manage to say, wheezing.

"Want me in there?"

"No!" I shout, panicked. The thought of him beside me has caused my nerves to freak out all the more.

Shit! I need to sort myself out.

I force myself to relax my shoulders. I begin slowing down my breathing, blowing out every breath through pursed lips as if blowing out a candle, while I place my hands on my stomach to feel the rapidity of my breathing. Happy thoughts, happy thoughts – I keep on chanting in my head. Think of cute little fluffy kittens, pandas, puppies, Dumbo, Chowder, minions, Timon and Pumbaa...

After several minutes, I have finally calmed myself down.

I had a panic attack again. I stand up and shake my head.

"For us." I whisper to myself.

I open the door, revealing a worried Trey. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." I say as I step out of the bathroom.

"Had a panic attack again?"

"Yup." I say, popping the 'p'.

"What caused it?"