Alone [IkariShipping/Paul x Dawn]

Last Chance

"Mom?"

My mom lovingly smiled. "Yes?"

"I'm so stressed out about what to sing. I really need to get this right."

My mom was much more wrinkly and slow moving than I remembered before she left years ago. She assures me that she's the same old her, but I think she's been undergoing serious amounts of stress. She's been taking on a job at an accounting firm while simultaneously taking care of her mother in a hone up north in the city. It was a surprise that she was even home at the moment, she hardly ever was. But I kept myself busy enough with the show.

"You should do songs I used to listen to before I moved to America. These are all Korean classics." The woman slowly took out her phone and sent me a playlist of many songs.

I did have the vague idea that I wanted to do a ballad, as I've only been performing upbeat songs the duration of the competition, and I wanted to show them that there was a completely different style of singing I was capable of. Soft power, with a lot of emotion.

Two songs into the playlist I found the perfect song. It was called Anymore, by a pianist. It was solely piano and a powerful voice, which both things I would be able to pull off.

When I got to the filming studio, I ran to one of the judges. Jubilantly exclaiming what song I'd be doing as instructed last night. Quickly, the judge approved with a smile, saying softly that she loved that song when she was little. I smiled and expressed my excitement in a friendly exchange.

They were so nice there, printing the sheet music for me, some girls passing me with smiles on my way to the practice room.

I hadn't played the piano in awhile, since moving to Korea. My skills were slightly lacking in comparison to where I was before I left. Humming the tune along with my hitting of keys, I was soon able to play the piece and sing along. The next step was having emotion and truly understanding the lyrics.

Wanting to put emotions into everything was a little difficult because I was one to bounce ideas off of others, but I was stuck by my lonesome. And when I was stuck by my lonesome, I was stuck thinking about Paul. Thinking about him distracted me, I'd be useless and reserved the rest of the day, trapped in thoughts of sadness and guilt.

I was luckily shaken from my thoughts when the same judge who approved my song asked, "Whee In, you're up next for the biography segment. Would they be able to shoot with you after today's practice?"

I wasn't sure what the woman was talking about. "I'm so sorry, I never knew about the biography segment."

"We talked about this last night before the ranking ceremony." I could hear the irritation through the consonants sounding from her voice. "Each finalist is having some of the camera crew follow them around a night after practice. This is so that the audience can really get to know who they're voting for."

I smiled and apologized for my absent-mindedness. "That's perfectly okay with me."

By the end of the day I had the lyrics memorized along with a vague idea of how I truly wanted to perform the song.

I met my two assigned cameramen in the brick lobby, smelling faintly of perfume from all the girls passing by busily every day. I figured I should introduce myself. "Nice to meet you gentlemen, I'm Jung Whee In." They each introduced themselves individually. Both short men with scruffy mustaches sipping coffee, and biting their lips. "Are you guys ready to head out?" They nodded enthusiastically, lugging all sorts of equipment in the two men's arms. I was shocked by their strength, asking, "Do you guys need help?" They insisted a harsh no, but I wasn't too pleased with their response.