Chapter 31: I Do It All For You

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"Yes, I want to know if this weekend, you'd like to go on a road trip with me to really celebrate your birthday," Gerard whispers in my ear.
"Of course," I reply. He walks over to his tv stand and pulls out a CD player. He pops in a cd and starts the music. He walks back over to me, grabbing my hand in his and placing the other around my waist, leaving me to place my other on his shoulder. I lean into his body as we slow dance in his apartment to slow classic rock songs. He accidentally steps on my foot and I try to ignore his apologies and continue dancing but he completely stops. I lean back in his arms and stare up at him. He kisses me before pushing me onto the couch. He lifts my foot and starts massaging it.
"You're good with your hands," I remark with a smirk.
"Lots of practice," he winks. I laugh. My mom calls and I have to pick it up.
"Frank, are you coming home? I need you," she says.
"Fine, I'll be right there," I reply. I hang up and sigh. I turn to Gerard who lets go of my feet and stands up.
"I'll drive you," he says.

We leave his apartment and head towards his car. It's dark already as he drives me back home. When we get to my place, he follows me inside.
"Mom?" I call. I don't see her and she doesn't call back. I head upstairs and look around for her. She's not in my room or her room or the bathroom. I stop, checking back in my room and I notice a note on my bed. I walk in and pick it up, its from her and all it is is a birthday card. I set it on my nightstand.

I race down the stairs, keeping my eyes on my feet so I don't stumble. I reach the bottom of the stairs and look up. I see Gerard cupping my mom's face and pressing her against a wall. Pain bubbles through my heart morphing into anger and jealousy. I storm out of the house, slamming the door behind me as I leave. I swear when I looked over at my mom, I could see her smirking even with his lips on hers.

Where am I gonna go? I can't go to Gerard's and I don't want to go back home.

I walk down the road, not really sure of where I'm going. The air is cool as the night wears on as the many kids trick or treat. I find myself in front of Brendon's house. I still remember where it is even after so long. I head up to the door and knock softly on it. I'm not really sure if I want to face him right now. I'm just so pissed off and he's the only person I know. He opens the door, shirtless and visibly tipsy.
"Frank! Come on in! We were just having a party! Happy birthday!" Brendon shouts.

I'm immediately whisked into his house and given a cup full of beer. I swallow it down as fast as I can and get a new one as he begins to introduce me to people. I meet a few kids but I don't really recognize anybody but with all the costumes, it doesn't make it easy and I can barely hear what he's saying their names are. I finish a few cups of beer, I lost count after 5. The music is blaring and my head is already pounding. All I can think of is what Gerard is probably doing with my mom and I can't shake the image as much as I want to. I head to Brendon's kitchen to find something a little stronger than beer. I find some vodka and fill my cup with it, walking back into the crowd with the bottle in my back pocket. I gulp down a sip and find the first lonely looking gay boy, and kiss him. He's cute so I pull him upstairs. He's wearing some fancy pirate like costume with weird makeup. I find Brendon's room and push the boy into it. I push him onto the bed and straddle his waist as I remove his shirt. My lips move to his neck and trail down his chest. I go to take off his pants and he stops me.
"I-I'm a virgin," the boy squeaks.
"So?" I look up at him, my hands sliding below his waistband, ready to pull his pants and boxers off in one motion.
"I'm scared," he replies. I groan and lay beside him. He sighs.
"What's your name?" I ask him.
"Ryan Ross," he answers.
"Hi, Ryan. I'm Frank Iero. Want some?" I offer him the bottle of vodka from my pocket. He takes it in his hands and takes a big drink of it, screwing up his face as he swallows it down.
"Do you usually hook up with random guys at parties?" He asks.
"This is my first try. I've never had to. I usually get enough from my boyfriend but I walked in on him making out with my mom. What a fucking birthday present," I blurt.
"Sorry about that but happy birthday, I guess," he sighs.
"Yeah, thanks." He gets over top of me and starts making out with me again.
"I came here to see Brendon but he's out there making out with some other guy," Ryan sighs.
"That sucks," I reply.
"You seem like a nice guy, uh, just be... I don't know... Gentle? I guess," Ryan offers. I flip him over and pull off his bottoms. I stick my fingers in my mouth, getting them nice and wet before sliding one into him. He closes his eyes as he moans. I add another finger as I slowly start moving in and out of him. He wraps his arms around himself as he arches his back, groaning. He reaches forward to touch himself and I slap his hand away. I pull my fingers out from inside of him and slowly position myself and slide my dick in. He leans his head back, gripping the sheets around him as he moans. I gently push in a little deeper before moving out and thrusting back in. I keep my movements steady until I see his facial expressions change from discomfort to pleasure. I begin to speed up a little. His makeup starts running down his face as he begins sweating. I struggle to hold myself up as the room starts spinning slightly.
"F-frank.. I'm gonna," Ryan moans.
"Hold off," I say. He can't, he comes all over his chest and to prevent any further discomfort to him, I pull out of him. He stands up and gets down on his knees to help. He takes me in his mouth. I knot my hands in his hair as he looks up at me. His eyes are kinda beautiful. His cheeks hollow as he moves his mouth around me. I moan. My legs start feeling a little shaky as I thrust deep into his mouth. He's either a natural at this or he's done this before. He exchanges his mouth for his hand and he starts rubbing me. I moan as I come all over his face.
"Sorry," I apologize.
"Don't worry about it," he replies. He stands up and I pull my pants back on. He walks out of the room and, not long after leaving, returns, wiping his face with a towel. I lay on the bed and curl up with a blanket around me. I take a drink and close my eyes. Ryan curls up next to me. I wrap my arms around him, holding him close. It's all I can do to stop myself from crying. I fall asleep shortly after Ryan does.

I wake up a little confused because I'm holding a naked guy in my arms in somebody else's room. My head is pounding and I vaguely remember what happened. I went to Brendon's after I caught Gerard and my mom making out... Right... I had some alcohol and I started making out with this kid and I fucked him. Oh God. I shake him awake. He looks up at me, his makeup smeared all over his face from wiping my come off.

I check my phone and see that Gerard left dozens of voicemails, none of which I check. I need to talk to him face to face. I can't do phone calls.

"What does that make us?" I ask Ryan. He takes a second before replying.
"Friends with benefits. I'm still after Brendon and you're still with your boyfriend but we're not just nobody to each other and fuck buddies doesn't really feel good to me," he replies.
"Works for me," I answer. I stand up and slip my shirt on.
"Where are you going?" Ryan asks.
"I need to get to school," I reply.
"Just take the day off," he says.
"I would but I really need to see somebody and ask what the fuck he was doing yesterday. I need an explanation," I reply. Ryan says, standing up and grabbing a pen from Brendon's desk. He scribbles a phone number on my arm.
"If you need to talk after today or if something goes wrong, call me," he says. He kisses my cheek and I leave.

I get to school and Gerard immediately pulls me into his class on my way to English class.

"I need to talk to you," he says. He closes his door behind me.
"I don't want to be alone with you right now," I sigh.
"Why not?"
"I saw you making out with my mom and who knows what else happened after I left!" I yell. Tears start streaming down my cheeks.
"It wasn't anything! I was trying to save my ass and your ass! If I get sent to jail, you're gonna get a fucking shitty rep as the kid who got fucked by the teacher! Did you want that?" Gerard shouts at me.
"No," I admit.
"I did it for you," he says, grabbing my tear stained face in his hand and pressing his lips to mine.
"Everything I've done lately has been for you."

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