✓ [18+] THERE GOES MY EVERYTHING

XXII.The Moment I Went To A Third-World Country

"That's for Bex since she's not here to give it to you herself. Trust me, Nate, you deserve more than that. I'd personally kick you in the balls like I'm sure Bex wants to but I really want to be an Aunt in the future."

I glare down at her and hear a ring of laughter behind me. I can already tell who it is as it gets closer.

Both Heather and my mom's eyes widen as they take in the sight of Ford while he walks up to us.

"Ford?" Heather asks as she walks up to him to give him a hug.

"Yeah, that's me Hev. Who else were you expecting?" he chuckles.

"I don't know you just look—different. It's weird seeing you dressed in uniform and with your hair, all cut shorter and not in your eyes," she smiles at him and I notice her cheeks start to blush.

Oh for fuck's sake.

"Thanks?" Ford questions and scratches at the back of his neck.

"Oh, don't get me wrong Ford, you look great," she beams and softly puts her hand on his bicep. Ford's eyes widen briefly at the contact but the happiness he's feeling from her touch is evident in his ridiculous smile.

A smile I started noticing he only had for her before we left for boot camp months ago.

I quickly glance between the two of them and start shaking my head. I'm about to tell them both to knock this shit off right now and remind Ford that she's my little sister when Mom gives me that damn 'mom look' and I quickly shut my mouth before any words come out.

Instead, I clear my throat to grab their attention, "Umm, hate to break up the reunion but can we fucking go? I'm dying for a burger from Jackie's Diner and to finally sleep in my own damn bed."

"Yeah, I should really get back home to see my parents," Ford tightens his grip on his bag but never looks away from Heather.

"Yeah, you go do that," I snap a little and he finally looks over at me with a quirked brow. He grins and backs away before giving me a wink.

"I will. And you brother, go home and change out your tampon because you're a cranky little bitch when you're on your period," he calls out loudly, making the people around us either drop their jaws or burst into fits of giggles. Heather being one of those gigglers.

I look down at her and she shrugs her shoulders at me, "What? He's right."

On the long trip home, both Mom and Heather hound me with question after question about training and what I intend to do once my R&R is done.

I haven't told them yet but when I leave the day after tomorrow, I'm officially leaving the United States and heading overseas for the first time in my life. Both Ford and I, luckily in the same unit, will be going on our first tour. A year-long commitment that won't be easy.

I know it's going to stress my Mom and Heather out but it'll give me the hands-on training that I need, not to mention the extra money and bonus I'll receive each time I go on tour.

When we finally make it to Jackie's diner, I'm so damn excited to be home that I can barely get out of the front seat fast enough. I hold the door open to the restaurant for the two of them and once I step in, I'm greeted to nearly a full house of people from our town with their eyes and mouths wide open.

I quietly lead Mom and Heather back to our usual booth and I hear the subtle whisper of someone in the booth next to us as they wonder if Bex has seen me yet. I begin to wonder where she is myself when I look over at Heather.

"So," I begin when the restaurant door opens up, and the man who walks through causes a lump to form in my throat.

Mike Miller.

He's dressed in his Sheriff uniform and walks up to the counter to talk to Martha, a waitress that's been here for a few years. She smiles up at him as she hands him a bag of food and when he turns towards our table, he stops in his tracks.

I half expect him to grin at me, Hell, maybe even yell out with excitement that I'm finally home but he doesn't.

Instead, his eyes narrow in a way I've never seen in my entire time of knowing him. Mike Miller pissed, especially aimed at you, is not a pleasant sight.

He slowly walks to our table and I freeze with anxiousness. I wait for him to possibly kick my ass for what I did to his daughter. A daughter he's very protective over remind you.

"Maria, Heather, how are you ladies tonight?" he asks as he finally looks at the two of them with a warm smile.

"Doing great Sheriff. How are you holding up since Bex is out of town for the holidays?" Mom asks and I look down at the table and frown.

I was hoping I'd get to see her while I was here. Possibly talk to her about what happened between us.

But maybe it's a good thing she's not because I have no idea what I'd say to her. It's still too soon and since I'm leaving to go to the Middle East for a year, the last thing I need to do right now is attempt to mend things between us. If it ended up rekindling our relationship, we'd just be right back where we were five months ago.

"I'm holding up, she's having a great time up North in Manitoba with Sarah's parents. You know Patty, she's keeping her busy. Which is what she needs to keep her mind off of certain things," Mike glances at me momentarily and I know that last bit was aimed at me.

Mom clears her throat and looks between the two of us, "Well, that's great Mike. Can't wait to hear all about it from her when she gets back in a couple of days."

"You two ladies have a great night and enjoy your meal," Mike gives them a smile and turns without a single word to me.

Holy shit. I never would've expected in my entire life that Mike Miller would treat me, someone, he always thought of as a son, like that.

Really? You're going to act shocked? You deserve worse and be thankful he didn't give you that.

As I sit and eat with my family, I notice other people looking over at me, most of them with either the same look in their eyes as Mike or disappointment. 

God damn. This is one thing I didn't miss. Living in a small town and everyone knowing my damn business. I wasn't even here to defend myself from whatever bullshit rumors have spread throughout this place.

Heather notices and puts a hand on my forearm to calm my nerves. It works momentarily but there's nothing that can fix the sting of feeling unwanted in your own home town.

When we finally get back home, I immediately go up to my old room and toss my bag at the end of my bed. I take off my uniform jacket and place it on the hook that's attached to the back of my closet door. I open it up and peer inside and when my eyes glance upwards, I notice a familiar shoebox.

I find my body moving all on its own as I pull it down from the shelf and move to my bed. I sit down and place it on my lap. Immediately I'm going through the contents and the feeling of regrets overwhelms me.

To add fuel to the fire, I sit the open box down on my bed and stand to rummage through my bag. In the very bottom, wrapped with a rubber band, is a stack of all the letters Bex sent me while I was in boot camp.

The one on top is the latest one she sent me. The one where she was begging me to not let go of what we had.

I place the letters in my shoebox, knowing I'll most likely read through these later tonight to add to my now miserable existence. I place the lid on top and put the box back on the shelf in my closet.

There's a strange sense of symbolism when I pull the chain on the light of my closet, turning it off.

That part of my life, definitely the most important part of it, is now over.

I leave for a third world country in just a few days and Bex Miller and the love that we created that night will be nothing but a memory.

A moment in my life that I'll never, ever, forget and will spend the rest of my days regretting I ever let it go.