Fulfilling Fate - Book 3

Chapter 1 - Within A Moment

"Mama," Nathan calls out for her. His little eyes scan the church in hopes of finding her. My mother's hold on him tightens. She cries on the shoulder of my one-year-old son while my father keeps her balanced. Every time I hear Nathan call out for his mother, I break all over again.

"Mina," Lia's voice laced with pain. The tremor in her body hasn't left since the day at the hospital. She has had to increase her antidepressants; they're not helping. I watch the girl fall apart. She's on the verge of passing out as Matteo holds her up.

I've honored the wishes of Petro. The only time he spoke was when he begged me for a closed casket. He doesn't want that to be the last image, memory of her. I agreed, the sisters agreed. I don't want to look at her colorless face. I preferred the images of her flaming red cheeks when she shied.

Tommy slides next to me and clasps my shoulder; not a word leaves his lips. We both focus on Stefano and Jaz. For the first time, they left their son with the nurses. They needed to say goodbye. Jaz holds onto Stefano's arm, continually crying, choking on her saliva. Grief consumes the air, and it's suffocating. Not one of us can comfort the other.

Kat is the last to walk in. Her eyes lock forward, staring at the altar. The sight of that casket has her knees buckling. She drops to the floor and fails miserably to muffle her cries. Her body won't allow her to stand. It's Nick that pulls her to her feet and helps her take a seat. Tommy lets out a heavy breath and rubs his eyes at the sight of her. Not one person remains unbroken.

Everyone is falling apart—everything is dismal—everything has lost its color.

The priest starts his chanting, and I do not understand a word. Do I care? No! Nothing will change the fact I've lost her. Nothing will bring her back. She's not in New York—she lies in a casket and soon will be underground. This isn't how it's meant to be. Sliding my hand in my pocket, I pull out her engagement ring, squeezing it in my hold. My future is shattered.

The memories of my proposal play like a movie. How nervous she was. How happy she was. That smile lit up the room. The constant heartbreak has me crippled, paralyzed. I bring my fist, holding her ring to my lips, and I mumble into it, "you left me. You've broken me." I feel Tommy's hand on my back. He exhales heavily.

This is new for him; he has no idea what to say or do; nothing brings comfort. Nothing fills the hole in my chest, yet my brother tries, although it's out of his comfort zone—he still tries. I focus on my breathing. The day is far from over; I have to keep it together. I want to be here, and I don't want to be here.

Tapping me on my shoulder, my brother motions me to stand. Complying, I slide her ring back into my pocket and walk towards the casket, lifting it onto our shoulders. Petro and I lead, Nick, Laz are in the middle and my two brothers behind them. The church bell rings in mourning as we walk her out and to the hearse. My hold tightens, and I lean my head on the side of her casket bile raises, and I swallow it back. I'm drowning in grief. I can't tread water.

Sliding her into the hearse, my eyes meet Petro's. Guilt engulfs him; he falters and shakes his head. Other than a couple of requests, he hasn't spoken another word since. He stands, staring at the box his cousin lays in. Bianca hauls him by the arm to the car.

I've chosen to ride alone today, just with an unknown driver. My son remains in my mother's care. Her son is incapable of looking after his own. As Nathan calls out for his mother, his green and teary eyes weaken me and drop me to my knees. Within a moment, we lost her.

Taking a seat in my car, the engine roars to life, and the driver slowly follows behind the hearse. The feeling is starting to return to my body. I need to feel numb. Pulling out my flask, I drown myself once more. It's the only way I'm getting through this. A part of me died along with her. Emptiness is all I feel. I'm trying; God knows I'm trying to pick up the pieces for my son's sake.