Cruel Destiny | Kylo Ren

Finalizer

There is misery in our home; I can sense it. It has soaked into the hardwood cracks and into the brick walls. It had been two days since Commander Victor had told the news of Five, Four and I's departure—and it had changed our home completely.

I saunter up and down the middle of my room, awaiting for the slow hands on the clock to reach the hour fixed for the departure of the boys and I. Anxiety floods my system. The fact that these ticking hands on the wall never move backwards did not in the least seem to restrain the desire to go back in time and stay here for eighteen years more.

I move from my pacing and sit on my window ledge that peers over the never-ending fields of this planet, and I can't help but sadly listen to the muffled sobs coming from the next room over: Three's room. She was distraught from the moment she had been told both Four and I would be leaving; but I haven't spoken to her since, I don't have the energy within my burning soul to calm her worries when I am riddled with my own.

By now, the suns were beginning to make the middle of the blue sky their home and I watch the way the birds dance in the wind and chirp happily from branches. I envy every single one of them. They're free. They create their own destiny, rather than have it mapped out for them.

A soft knock comes from my door.

"Come in," I rasp, my voice sounding unfamiliar. I didn't have to snatch my gaze from the window to know who it was, standing now beside me.

I can hear Three's rattling breath as she tries to stifle her cries, and I can sense the unease as she tries to find something to say–but she doesn't have to say anything as I look to her and force a warm smile.

"Sit," I say, motioning to the spot on the windowsill where my boots lay.

Three attempts to mimic my smile, but the corners of her rosy lips twitch downwards ever so slightly. I look into her warm eyes that shone the colour of dampened grass in the summer and notice the whiting a little red. She moves to the windowsill and my knees crack as I move my feet from her spot, tugging them to my chest.

We stare at each-other for a moment, both trying to find something to say but she beats me to it.

"Embrace your destiny," She croaks, her eyes tearing up as she turns to look out the window; I do the same.

I swallow the lump in my throat, "—With open arms and welcoming."

She turns back to me and as Three scans my face; the silence hangs in the air like the suspended moment before a falling glass shatters on the ground. I know she expects me to crumple, wail or dissolve into tears, but I know I must find strength and accept my fate.

"It's okay," I breathe, my voice ever-so-fragile, "You'll be just fine without me, and One and Two are still home... you need to be strong for them."

Her tears burst forth like water from a dam, spilling down her pale face whilst the muscles in her chin tremble like a small child's would.

"It is not us I worry about! It is you!" She cries, "—How am I to act strong when I don't even know if you are safe?"

There is a static in my head, the side effect of this fear I hide within. She had a purpose to her tears, the First Order is an Empire and we had never been let out of our cage to explore its danger–I had no idea of what destiny has planned and that is what scares me the most.

I hear my own sounds, like a distressed child, crawl from the inside and escape my throat as a brief sob. It takes something out of me I didn't know I had left to give.

Shaking my head, despite my tears I fake a small smile, and place my hands upon her own which rest limply in her lap, "I will be okay. Four and Five will be there to look after me."