flatline [m.s]

cxiv.

- - -
you know that story where a child gets trapped under a car and their parent finds the superhuman strength to lift the car and save the child's life?
- - -

"here's the plan," lia confidently tells bailey who is following her into the scrub room. bailey stands still and watches lia grab a scrub mask as she continues talking. "we're gonna embolise the tumour to see if we can reverse the effects on mom's circulation. and if not, then i'm afraid-"

"where's herman?" bailey cuts lia off as she looks through the window, into the o.r.

"glenda's platelet count is critically low, so we need to give her six packs of platelets to avoid liver capsule bleeding," lia continues, ignoring bailey's question, as they both begin to scrub in. "and then we'll perform the fetoscopy to reverse the cascade-"

"you keep saying 'we', but i only see you," bailey interrupts again. "where the hell is herman?"

"she's not coming," lia reveals, continuing to look forward as bailey looks to her with wide eyes.

"what do you mean she's not coming?" bailey's tone is pointed, but lia doesn't answer, she just continues to scrub.

- - -
i always wondered if that was real. if someone i cared about was hurt or trapped, would my instincts kick in?
- - -

"the baby's anaemic. let's transfuse him. forty millilitres of irradiated prbc," lia instructs, now in glenda castillo's surgery.

"lia, we need to get in and out," bailey argues. "glenda's pressure is through the roof."

"well, if we don't stop this bleeding, the baby will die," lia points out. "and the idea is to save both of them, and i think that i can do it."

lia closes her eyes, and her mind flashes back to when she had only just began her fellowship. back to when she hated the way nicole spoke to her.

"do you think, or you know?" nicole challenged, cocking her head to the side.

"i know i can," lia corrects herself, re-opening her eyes to look across the o.r table to bailey.

"alivia, i respect you and consider the you a friend, so it is with kindness when i tell you that you're only half a fetal surgeon, not even," bailey protests, shaking her head. "you're half a fellow."

"you brought this patient to me," lia reminds her.

"no, i brought this patient to your boss," bailey snaps back.

"i have spent four and half months getting everything that dr. herman knows pounded into my brain," lia argues.

"do you hear yourself?" bailey raises her brow. "four and a half months? you almost died in the middle of that!"

"you want herman's hands, you have them right here," lia assures, her voice stern. she then turns to the scrub nurse beside her. "twenty two gauge needle."

"here you go," the nurse hands her the needle, and bailey sighs as lia begins her work.

■ ■ ■

"it's not working," lia shakes her head, part way into her surgery. "i can't embolise all the vessels."

as she continues to try, her mind begins to wander back to the early stages of her fellowship again.