19. Forgiveness and Poison

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Dedicated to @jigeumkkaji or your support. It's people like you that inspire me to write! More dedications to come!

There was a beat of silence after my outburst where no-one dared say a thing. Snape took in my face with a mixture of distaste and anger. However at that moment I couldn't bring myself to feel bad for my behavior. The shit that I had been through over the past months had obviously changed me but one redeeming thing had been the true revelation of my parentage. I could feel it now deep in my bones. I didn't feel like the daughter of a monster anymore. I was the product of love and my father was a passionate man who had had one hell of a life full of pain and misery  and yet still managed to find it within himself to love not only Harry but me as well. Until now I don't think I realized how powerful another's deep love for you could change who you were and how you saw yourself. The more he loved me the less I felt like a monster and for that I owed him my undying loyalty. Unfortunately I was pulled out of my thoughts by Snape's low tones. 

"Again Miss Black, I will ask you to leave my classroom and I warn you not to return until you can control yourself." 

Letting out a small breath I bent to pick up my things and shove them in my bag ready to make a quick exit from the classroom. Yet before I could I felt a hand reach and grab mine. I looked beside me in surprise and saw Harry give me a smile of encouragement that told me to keep my head up. I gave his hand a squeeze in thanks and shuffled off. My shoes tapped on the flagstones and I again got lost in my own thoughts as I headed back to the common room. Another product of Sirius' revelation was that Harry and I had grown closer. Connected by our shared ties I looked at him as a brother along with Edward, Emmet and Jasper. The Cullens had been surprisingly good with letting me go back to school but I could tell Esme was a little upset as she had only just gotten me back.  Carlisle as always was very level-headed and calmed her down before giving me a reassuring look. 

The Common Room was empty when the portrait swung open and I set my books up on a communal table before getting to work and my now large pile of assignments. 

***

That night Hermione and I sat by the fireplace quietly talking about our Potions assignment when we were interrupted by a high-pitched giggle. My gaze swung over to a certain ginger with his tongue down Lavender Brown's throat. It was no ordinary kiss. No it was semi-violent and overly sloppy, so bad that I could start to feel my dinner coming back up. 

"Now that is just plain disgusting." When Hermione didn't reply I looked up at her and saw her face drawn sadly downwards. 

Way to go you insensitive asshole!

Clearing my throat I spoke up. "Anyway, what do you say we head up? I was wondering if you could show me that spell you use on your hair in the mornings? It always looks so soft..." I trails off as she slowly turns to me digesting what I said. When a flash of relief crosses her eyes I jump up and offer her a hand which she takes.

"With pleasure." She bites out.

Oh poor Hermione.

***

The next morning I woke up to an empty bed. Kai hadn't come back last night and I felt a small pang in my chest. I tried not to let it bother me as I headed down to breakfast. 

"Hey Anna! Come sit here!" I look over towards the Ravenclaw table and see Jezebel and Jace sitting together. Though quite a few people had turned to look as she called out I ignored the glances and made my way over to her. Very soon the normal chatter of the Great Hall resumed.

"How are you guys?" I looked to Jace in particular and he managed a small smile. Well it was better than nothing. 

"Not too bad after.. you know, everything." I hummed and gave a small nod.

"Been a pretty rough year eh?" They both smiled at me before Jace spoke again. 

"Hey Anna, I just want to say that I don't blame you for what happened. Alex was one of my best friends and though it rips me apart thinking about him being gone it wasn't your fault. He chose his path and he chose wrong." His eyes bored into mine with sincerity. 

At his words my heart tugs sharply upwards and I feel a pinch behind my eyes. I lean over and give him a side hug that he returns. 

"Thank you Jace, I can't tell you how much that means to me." 

He gives me his first true smile and after that was all cleared up our breakfast was full of much lighter conversation and laughs. 

Lessons that day were considerably more boring than the previous days. I had no more outbursts at teachers and I hung out with Hermione for most of the day. That night we were both sat in the Common Room working together when she spoke up.

"Where is Kai?" I had been wondering the same thing all day. I shrug trying to play it off as if I wasn't worrying.

"Not sure. He said he was going to be back my last night but he wasn't." She didn't seem to buy my feigned nonchalance.

"I'm sure he'll turn up soon. Knowing him he probably has all these important things to attend to. I nod.

"Yeh I'm sure, it's just this bond between us. It makes it hard to be away from each other, like a constant ache in my chest that won't go away unless I see him." I could feel it now as I spoke and a hand unconsciously rose up to massage the spot in my chest which had been coiled uncomfortably all day long.

"What does it feel like? The bond I mean." The curiosity in Hermione's voice was obvious so I tried my best to describe it.

"It feels... well it's so hard to put it into words. But it feels like a constant tether. I can sense what he feels, when he's upset or worried. It's so deep it's like my very soul has been halved and given to him and his to me. I know that sounds stupid but it's true. I know now that I would never be able to live without him as cliche as that sounds. Like my life before meeting him was meaningless... empty. He is the missing piece." I breathe out and glance at Hermione who was looking at me dreamily. I give her a playful nudge. She smiles at me.

"You know you glow slightly when you talk about him? And I really mean actual glow."

Looking down at my hands I see a ring of feint light around them. 

"Holy crap." I stare at it for a few seconds longer before we are interrupted with someone hurrying loudly through the portrait. Looking over I see Ginny barreling towards Hermione and I quite out of breath.

"Quick! Come with me!" She pants and rests her hands on her knees. I look over at Hermione to see her just as confused as me.

"What's the matter Ginny?" She asks the younger girl.

"It's Ron! He's been poisoned! 

Well that's it for now! To be honest I couldn't remember where I was up to in the story line so here is what I decided. Hope you guys enjoyed and the next one will be out soon.

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