Back to Me (Camila/You)

1

Camila's POV

Flashback

I struggled to drag myself onto the bus, telling one of the crew members good morning when he smiled and waved at me. I let out a sigh, knowing what I was about to do would not only break the girl who was waiting for me outside, but also break me.

Hell, it had already broken me to come to the decision that I chose.

Y/n and I had been dating for months and things were great for a while, that was until I left for tour. Our relationship had been shakey for the past couple of weeks, and I knew I could take all of the blame for that.

I was so busy with shows, interviews, and everything else that came with touring that I barely had time for her. We called every night, but by the time I was actually avaible to talk to her I was so exhausted that I was lucky to be on the phone for twenty minutes before I passed out.

She said she didn't mind me being so busy, but at the end of the day I knew she deserved better. She deserved someone that could be there for her.

We were currently in Italy. We were up early because we needed to go get some extra rehearsals done in the venue for tonight. I knew it was around nine at night back home, so Y/n would be awake. I also knew if I was going to make this phone call then I had to do it now.

If I waited any longer I would chicken out and things would only get worse.

"Hey, guys?" I said to get the other girl's attention. "I'm going make a phone call really quick before we start."

"You don't have to tell us everytime you call your girl, Mila," Dinah laughed. "Go ahead. We'll tell them that you're coming in a bit."

I nodded to the girl before turning around and walking somewhere that I would be alone.

My hands were shaking as I went to my contacts and clicked on her name. She answered after only two rings.

I took a deep breath as I heard her sweet voice come through the speaker of my phone.

"Hey, love."

I could practically hear the smile on her face and it killed me that I was about to take that away.

"I wasn't expecting a call. You guys are up early today."

"Yea, we had to get to the venue early. Something about tweaking the choreography."

"How's Italy?" She asked, and I pinched the bridge of my nose.

We were making small talk and I needed to get ahold of this conversation.

"Y/n," I started. "We need to talk about something."

"Um... okay? Go ahead. I'm listening."

My heartrate was through the roof at this point and my hands were sweating.

"Camila, what's wrong?" She asked when I didn't speak up.

"I can't do this anymore, Y/n," I mumbled, tears brimming in my eyes. "The distance is killing us."

"What are you talking about?" She asked, panic laced in her voice. "Is this a joke? I thought we were doing great."

"It's not a joke," I sniffled. "Look at us. We talk once a day if we're lucky. I haven't seen you in months. I just- I can't do this."

What I was saying didn't make much sense, but I had to be cryptic about it. If I told her everything she would talk me out of this.

"Camila, that doesn't make any sense," she said, and I could tell she was a little annoyed. "Are you breaking up with me?"

"Yea," I mumbled, tears streaming down my face.

"Are you serious? You're breaking up with me because of the distance? You're the one who was so insistant that distance wouldn't be a problem! You told me you could handle it!"

I bit my lip as I heard her voice begin to raise.

"I know what I said," I told her with a sob. "I don't want to do this-"

"Then why are you?" She asked, and it broke my heart because I could hear her choking up.

I was doing it because she deserved so much more than I could give her.

"I'm doing it because I have to," I told her. "I need to go."

"Camila, if you hang up this phone right now then that's it," she told me.

"Goodbye, Y/n."

She was the one to end the call, the click seeming to trigger the waterfall of tears that began as soon as I heard it.

I slowly made me way to the stage where the other girls already were.

"Camila?" I heard Dinah call as soon as she saw me. "What's wrong?"

The other girls rushed over to me as well, wondering the same thing.

"I ended it."