Fallen Embers

16

Zayyed

Today has sure been a stressful day, but on the bright side I met with nina's mom I absolutely adore her she's so much like my mother, she's funny and kind just like ammi.

I feel like introducing them to each other, but knowing ammi She'll probably throw a fit on how I didn't tell her I found a wife,she believes am in love with nina,and a part of me is already agreeing.

I can't believe hassan took the car and left me here, he's the first guy that I know that doesn't like cars, he hates driving.

The only time he drives is when am not available or when am in the mood to not put up with his shit.

She hugged me.

I still can't believe she hugged me, her perfume was so mashaAllah, I don't normally like women's perf, heck I don't even know how other women smell.

But with her I know everything, like when she clenches her eyes shut when she's embarrassed.

Or when she bites her lips when she's nervous.

Her lips.

Ya rabb forgive me.

She hugged me and I liked it.

I know it goes against my religion, we can't touch or think of women this way unless we're married to them, but with her I just can't help it.

She's pretty, very pretty.

And am starting to like our little facade,as long as I get to see her the rest...I don't care honestly.

Making my way to my room I sat on my bed and grabbed my laptop,time for work.

My growling stomach made me wake up and alhamdulillah i woke up in time for maghreb,after praying i went downstairs and met mama.

"Mama i want to tell you something and i want you to listen dan rasulu don't interrupt"

"Ouu gossip am in"

Mama grinned sipping water she turned to face me.

"Okay let's eat first"

When we were done we both moved to the living room.

"Soo its about the girl i met at the wedding-"

"Alhumdulillah i said it!!you're smitten"

Amma exclaimed cutting me off.

"Mama let me talk first mana"
I groaned palming my head.

"Okay okay ina jinka"

She grinned tapping her fingers on the throw pillow she was hugging.

"Its been long i felt this way,with the way things ended with the last woman i loved am scared mama,but this woman ,hanina she's special,she makes me feel some kinda way,i just have this strong urge to protect her. I....i its not lust no its not that,but i feel like holding her each time she's near,she's really pretty and smart...i feel most alive when am around her,i love her presence and its too early cause i mean,when did we meet?am falling for her and am falling hard amma...but am just so scared".

Scooting closer to me amma made my lie on her lap while she played with my trimmed hair.

"Now listen son and listen carefully,its okay to be scared,you're human but what ever happened to zee was qadr,don't fret over it...she's in a better place inshaAllah and even she would want to see you happy,she would want to see you fall inlove again,if what you feel for this girl is true,then it doesn't matter how early it is, go for it.