Bad Boy Benefits

(20)

"No, of course, you haven't," I grabbed his hand and gave him a reassuring squeeze.

Ryan was sweet and gentle and everything that I needed right now.

So why wasn't I happy?

He looked down at our hands and smiled.

"So I was wondering-"

A loud horn stopped him in his tracks and I looked up the drive to find Brody waving his hands around impatiently.

"Ryan comes on," He yelled. I could have sworn I saw him glance down at our hands and frown.

Ryan gave an apologetic look "I'll see you tomorrow at school,"

"Yeah see you tomorrow,"

He nodded and turned to leave, but not before turning back and unexpectedly leaning in to give me a kiss on the cheek. His lips lingered for a couple of seconds. It was warm and soft against my skin.

"Bye," he whispered as he leaned back, his eyes gleaming with a smile on his face.

I stared wide-eyed at his body as he retreated back to the car. I snuck a glance at Brody and regretted it. His lips held into a thin line and his hands gripped the steering wheel. I could see Rose talking to him, but it seemed he wasn't listening to a word that she was saying.

Ryan hopped back into the car and I watched Brody's mouth moved as he muttered something to him. He glanced back at me and shook his head harshly turning the steering wheel and disappearing down the road.

I stayed outside for a couple of seconds, trying to register what had just happened. Ryan had kissed me, I know it wasn't a full-blown make-out session but his lips still touched me. It was nice.

But nice isn't what you want.

I tried to push that thought away and accepted it for what it was. A cute guy had kissed me and I should be happy, I mean I am happy, I just deep down wished it was someone else who had done it.

But that someone else doesn't feel the same. I mean he looked angry at the fact Ryan had kissed me, but it's probably because he doesn't think I'm good enough for him.

That had to be it right?

I shook my head trying to forget about tonight's events and put my keys into my front door, pulling it open. I paused when I heard music coming from the living room. It was unusual for my mom to have company over. She was never around enough to host.

I carefully shut the door, trying to make a minimal amount of noise and slowly walked down the corridor. I could have sworn I heard ragged breaths and the sound of liquid pouring into a glass.

If I found her spread eagle with her meditation instructor I would lose my shit.

As soon as I reached the door, I twisted it open and froze.

Sat on the floor with pictures after pictures sprawled out on the rug was my mom. She kept taking sips of her wine and rubbing at her cheeks. I could only see the back of her and did not know what her face looked like.