B+A

Brice Thursday

Aizlynn walks in on me when I'm only in my boxers. I scream like a girl and say sarcastically, "What am I gonna do?! I've been caught!" Then I see the stern look on her face. Maybe not a good time to do that.

"Do you even wash your own laundry?"

"What?"

"Do you?"

"I guess. Sometimes."

"I bet you somebody else does it. Because I see a huge pile of clothes right there. You need to start doing your own."

I hold up my hands in surrender, "I can explain, Mom." I don't think she's in the mood.

She just gives me the death glare. "Do I have to pick this up, or will you?"

I rush out of the room. "I have fun plans for today!"

"Fine! I'll be the mature one!" I hear her yell.

I walk down the stairs and grin. Sweet. A girlfriend who does my laundry. Technically I don't have an excuse to be down here, because I already ate breakfast, and I still need to get dressed.

Aizlynn huffs when she reaches the bottom of the stairs a couple minutes later, and I realize she's sweating. And, damn, that's a lot of laundry. "Where's the washer and dryer at?"

"Um... upstairs?" I grin, sheepishly. Oops?

"Oh my fuckin' God! Brice. You couldn't have told me that when we were up there?!"

Ooh. This is bad. The Christian swore. That means it's bad. Like, real bad. 

"Oh my God!" She throws her hands up in the air. "You're bringing this back up."

I grin and cross my arms over my chest. "Make me."

That girl literally stares straight into your soul. It's creepy. I didn't know Christians could do that. They're all like, "Let me check your soul to see if you're holy enough for me". 

Apparently I'm not holy enough for Aizlynn, because she comes storming after me with fire in her eyes.

"Can I take that back?" I whimper.

And, I kid you not, somehow this makes her Christian mind more enraged, after I just was, like, trying to take back my "unholy words".

Okay, run.

I sprint up the stairs, without the laundry basket, might I add, which made me even more unholy than I already was. She storms up right after me, and I hide in the nearest room in a closet. 

I hear her shuffle around the room. I even hear her look in the bathroom, and right when I'm about to leave, she comes out, and heads straight for the closet. Oh, shit.

I hear a knock on the door.

"Nobody's home?" I try.

She swings open the door. "You didn't think to hide better? How's it supposed to be fun?"

Oh, mother fuckin' Jesus. I thought she was gonna whip my ass. "Well, you were like a mad man coming after me. And did you just say I was fun?" I take a step and she holds out her hand.

"You're not going anywhere without my permission." I slam the door closed and she yells, "Ow!"

I quick open it again, and see her holding her nose. "Brice!" She slaps me.

"I'm sorry..." I hug her. "But you still love me, right?"

She glares at me. "Come. Here." She pulls away, grabs my wrist, and drags my back down the stairs.

She points to the basket.

I walk right past it, and stop in the kitchen. I stick my tongue out. "Make me," I say, because I'm stupid.

*

"Girls always get what they want, and guys have to do all the work..." I complain.

She looks at me from the top of the stairs. I'm still carrying it up. "Maybe it's 'cause we're too hot for you to resist..."

"Some of 'em," I say.

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

I show her the laundry room, and I start to walk out.

"Nuh-uh." She grabs the collar of my shirt, and pulls me back in. "Sooner or later you're gonna have to do your own laundry."

"I do... Psht."

"Okay, put your laundry in."

That literally takes two minutes. I hate washers now.

"Start it."

"I'm sorry?"

"Start it."

"Like I know how to do that," I scoff. Does she really think I can do that?

She pours some stuff into a random drawer on the washing machine. "Push that button," she instructs. "Now, that one. Two more times. And that one once. Okay, now turn the dial to the right once. And that dial three times to the left. Now click start. There, you did it, ya' dimwit."

"I'm not a dimwit because I didn't know how to start a washing machine!"

"You're nineteen!"

"I got held back a year! I'm as stupid as you are!"

"I know how to work a fuckin' washing machine!"

I grin. I rest my elbow on the dryer, and then put my jaw on my hand. "I really like pissing you off, I'm sorry."

She huffs and storms away.

"Did I ever tell you that you have a nice ass?!" I yell.

She spins around on her heel.

And, you cornered yourself in a laundry room with a washing machine that could potentially ruin your hair. Good going, Brice. Yeah, good job. You have a way of doing that to yourself. You done great.

She walks up to me and pushes me against the wall. "Stop fucking making me mad, or I will fucking murder you."

"Now, where's the fun in that?"

She squeezes my cheeks and knees my crotch I groan a little. Ooh, damn that hurt.

"And if you don't shut the fuck up, I will do it again."

"Oh, really?" I put my hands in front this time. "Now, where's the fun in that?"

She attempts to knee me again, but I catch her leg. "Bad choice, Azzy." I flip her around, which I could've done before, but it's more fun now. I press her back up against the wall. She tries to get herself out of the situation she put herself in to. "Aizlynn, we both know I'm stronger than you."

"Shut up!"

"No, you." I put my one arm around her waist and my other hand on her cheek. I kiss her, and she tries to pull away, but she's got nowhere to go. I let her pull away and I can see her trying not to smile.

"Don't smile," I say and let go.

"Don't let go," she says and punches me.

"Don't punch," I say, and slap her butt.