Always You || Patrick Cripps

45.

Even if it wasn't my place to say or do so, I still had those feelings. I still loved him as much as I did when we were teenagers. The feelings never wavering, even when I was in my own relationship.

Eventually it did become to hard to see. I left the room quietly to sneak off and collect myself.

I slid down a nearby wall outside the function room, hoping to clear my head. I was in annoyance with myself that I let my feelings become visible. That I couldn't bottle it up and forget about it.

That was the way it had always been and I didn't want anyone catching on anytime soon. But then I felt someone sit down next to me, that person being Bella.

"What's going on?" she questioned.

"Nothing just got a bit overwhelmed in there" I explained.

"I know it's hard watching him with other girls" she suggested, sharing the look of pity with the others in my life that knew.

"It shouldn't be though. I should be happy for him" I said in frustration.

"I know how much you care about him, and I can tell how much he cares about you, so it's never going to be easy to see each other be with other people. But one day you guys will get there, I can almost promise it. You're too perfect for each other, you just have to wait for the right time" Bella told me, comforting me in the best way.

The two of us then went back inside, no one really noticing we had left except for Fish. We kept smiling, pretending everything was okay even though in my mind it wasn't. This was the start of my nightmare.

Seeing him love someone the way I wished he loved me. It was the most insufferable pain that I wouldn't wish on my own worst enemy. I knew I could cope with it, I had once before and I would do it again.

...........

The evening unfolded as I anticipated. Pat got his emotions out through the drinks he inhaled through the night.

He let loose and had a good night with his mates which I was satisfied with. The girl didn't stick around for long, Pat ended up rejecting her as well and dragging me to dance with him.

In the end I thought we had a good night. Pat was having fun and that was all that mattered at that point in time.

I knew releasing his frustrations was the only solution for Pat specifically. If he bottled it up, it always lead to further complications down the line.

When everyone else decided to head home, I knew it was our turn to leave. The only place I thought of going to was my own house. Pat was too drunk to do anything to help so I had to organise it all as he continued to muck around with the boys.

After 30 minutes of confusion with the Uber app, I got us both in the car in one piece. I greeted the driver before getting comfortable with Pat in the back seat as he lay his head on my lap.

The two of us were close to falling asleep as we waited to get home. The drive felt long and my feet were still aching. Pat was falling asleep on my lap but said a few words every once and a while.

When we reached home, I had to help Pat as we walked up the driveway. He was a bit wobbly for a big fella and he was leaning most of his weight on me.

Once we got up to the door I unlocked it quickly and wrapped my arm back around Pat to help him inside. He definitely wasn't as bad as he seemed, I just wanted to make sure he got to bed alright.

I lead him to the spare room as he thanked me continuously for helping him. He was a sappy drunk sort of guy, it was always amusing to me.

Once I made sure he was all settled, I let him be and returned to my own bedroom. I was quick to take my heels off, releasing my feet from the stress.