Always You || Patrick Cripps

18.

Georgia's POV

It had been about a month since Darcy and I broke up. It had also been about a month since Pat and I had even talked.

Ever since we kissed that night, he hadn't talked to me at all. He hadn't even tried to reach out to me.

That put my confidence right down. The insecurities I had were coming to the surface. The way he made me feel and that sick feeling hadn't disappeared.

With the realisation that a 4 year relationship had just ended, I was in a bit of a bad state.

Even if it was a relationship that wasn't working for half of that time. I had only now realised that I shouldn't have stayed with him and that I wasted years of my 20's.

Tash and Grace were always there to comfort me every time I thought of what happened.

I wish it was Pat but clearly he wanted nothing to do with me. He made that very clear with the lack of contact.

Not even a message. Not a single call or anything. I hadn't heard his voice in what felt like forever and I hated it.

I wanted to be close again. Where we were before everything happened. Where I could tell him anything and not feel judged.

That was the Pat I longed for. Not the one that made me feel so small and alone. Not the guy that left me that night.

To me, he was a different person now.

I wanted to tell Pat how I actually felt about that kiss. I wanted to so badly but I was afraid.

Terrified of how he would react. I had never gone this long without talking to him.

I remembered whenever I was in trouble in high school or I was just having a bad day. Seeing his face, was the only thing that would make me feel better.

But now it couldn't have been more different. It was also a worry of mine. That everything had changed too much and maybe it wouldn't go back to the way it was before.

I sat on my bed pondering what I could do. Everyone was giving me advice but I didn't feel like there was anything to do.

I wanted so badly to be the one to talk to him. But I wasn't sure if I had it in me. I would need a lot more courage to go and tell him.

It wasn't going to be easy. I've had never done anything like that before.

But I think I wanted to. I wasn't sure what he thought because he didn't tell me anything.

He could have the same feelings that I had. He could actually feel the same way. I was hopeful and it was a good feeling.

Even if he didn't, I just couldn't stand the thought of us losing touch.

He was always my best friend and I knew I couldn't lose him. Everyone around me knew that I needed him.

I wasn't as happy without him. I had lost weight, I hadn't been sleeping as well and I hadn't smiled properly in a while.

Of course I had other things in my life cheering me up. But there were always thoughts about him in the back of my mind.

It was emotionally draining and I had enough. I wanted to take matters into my own hands and tell him how I felt.

Even if it meant a little embarrassment. Even if it made us drift further apart. I decided to take the risk because I knew that no matter what, this wouldn't end our friendship.

There was no harm in trying. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I waited longer and looked back on my life with regrets.

I didn't want any regrets regarding how I felt about Pat. That's what pushed me over to edge to tell him.