Forced to Become

Ch 42 packs

Four lazy days passed. Every day, I had breakfast in bed, and soup filled with beef and vegetables for lunch and dinner. Alpha had Steven fix me a hot toddy every evening before it was time to sleep. Alpha left for awhile after breakfast each day. He was back after checking on his pack, making sure everyone was secure, which is where he was now. He wouldn't let me walk, carrying me to the bathroom when I needed to go. I took a perverse joy in watching the water swirl around the commode when I flushed.

A smile overtook me as I heard David and Toby splashing in the tub together. With the excuse of making sure everyone was warm, I'd convinced Alpha to let the others bathe as well. I looked down when Bobby tugged on the oversized sweatshirt I was still wearing.

"Alpha got us some mattresses," Bobby whispered, grinning up at me.

I smiled back, hugging him. Alpha was serious about making sure we didn't die from the cold. Everyone was wearing sweatpants, even if they didn't fit well. Clothes, however limited, and beds of sorts- it was a good beginning. Even better was the relationship between Alpha and I.

At first, Alpha was mad at Beta, thinking I had disobeyed and Beta couldn't control me. Once he understood I had asked to stay out for another moment and Beta had given permission, he wasn't so mad. He was still snappy, and everyone was on edge around him, except me. Alpha had been very attentive during my recovery, spoon-feeding me, and having the others cuddle with me in shifts to keep me warm.

It was odd, but I was less stressed now. I had a feeling some of my relaxation came from the "medicine" that was given to me every night. I tried not to think about what my mom would say about me getting tipsy. I'd been sleeping soundly, and often napped during the day. I resisted the temptation to stick my thumb in my mouth like Bobby often did. That constant knot in my stomach had mostly gone away. The only thing that worried me was not seeing Beta. Alpha kept him out of the room at first, to watch over the rest of the pack. I figured it was partially how Alpha was punishing Beta for making me sick.

Alpha and I talked often. I told him about the difference between Beta's fur and mine, explaining that Beta couldn't have known I would get colder than him. I also expressed my hope that Alpha would forgive Beta, who was still a little boy, and learning. I whispered those words to Alpha during those rare moments when no one else was around. I didn't want it to get back to Beta that I called him a little boy, even though he was. Alpha had only looked at me thoughtfully, but had stopped punishing Beta with his constant demands, and he let Beta escort the meals in.

My favorite times were between lunch and dinner. Alpha would tell stories about the differences between a natural-born royal and the bitten. A royal could control his ability to change forms, he explained, and could change faster. The bitten could not control themselves and needed to be commanded. I wasn't sure I totally believed him, even though it was true that we automatically changed form on command.

There were hidden dangers for the bitten as well. Alpha told stories from his boyhood, about the bitten who would get stuck as a wolf, unable to resume human form, and be killed before they could hurt someone. Their minds, Alpha explained, had reverted to animal instincts, and they could no longer think as men.

Sometimes, he told us about fights that would break out among the bitten, how they couldn't control themselves when they got upset. Their anger caused them to change to wolf, snapping at everyone. The royal guards would subdue them, often killing them in the process. He explained that it was to avoid such circumstances that he was so strict with us. He was protecting us from ourselves.

I couldn't argue with Alpha's reasoning. I wanted my pack safe. The more Alpha talked about things he had seen happen among the bitten who once existed in the pack, the more I came to agree with why he did what he did. I didn't like his punishments, and I was terrified of his mindless rage, but I understood Alpha more now. It was better to be slapped a few times and obey, than lose control and want to fight everyone. Shawn's partial shift after Andre died, when it looked like he wanted to fight, came to mind. I had calmed him down then. I wasn't sure that would work in the future if he decided to ignore me. I did know Shawn wouldn't ignore Alpha.