Forced to Become

Ch 39 night

Wind.

That was the first thing I noticed as I shivered. It blew across my naked skin, and despite the frigid temperature, it felt good. For just a moment, I ignored Beta. I stood, arms slightly out, eyes closed and head raised. For this moment, I set aside the invisible shackles that bound me. I didn't imagine any fanciful scene, didn't worry about what was below us. For this moment, I understood the phrase, "living in the now."

The cold air was sharp in my nostrils, and chilled me from the inside, yet I eagerly took breath after breath. Opening my eyes, I saw the night sky. It wasn't as star-filled as back home. The moon was a narrow crescent. I smiled slightly, watching clouds go across it. The world was still out there. What was that book I had read as a kid? Something about being connected to those we were separated from, because they were looking at the same moon I was. I could picture my parents standing on the front porch, my mom leaning against my dad's shoulder. Mom would be holding back her tears, and Dad would put his arm around her, hugging her close.

I became aware of Beta moving around me. Reluctant to face my reality, I tried to ignore him for a minute more.

"What are you thinking?" Beta asked from in front of me.

When I finally looked at him. He was dressed in the same jeans and shirt he had on when they captured me. He was holding out my jeans. My brow furrowed in confusion. Beta gestured up, and I quickly took the jeans and slid them on. I looked down in puzzlement when I couldn't fasten them. I'd grown, I thought in wonder. Then I felt foolish. Spring to winter; I guess we'd all grown. Despite my freezing feet, the jeans helped, and they were warm.

"Why are they warm," I couldn't help asking.

"I stored them in the exhaust pipe. Answer my question. What were you thinking just now?"

I focused on the boy before me. Shirt for him, but not for me. He was still worried about me escaping. I couldn't help look down, and felt somehow relieved when I saw his feet were bare too. I sighed, wondering how to answer his question in a way that wouldn't get him upset again.

"I was thinking my parents might be looking up at the moon, just like me. I wish I could let them know I was ok, Beta, that I have a new home, that I'm safe," I added for his benefit, thinking safe was a relative term.

"How would you tell them this?" Beta asked. He seemed genuinely curious, and not upset.

I thought for a second. I knew my first impulse to say, "call them," wouldn't work. I would break down hearing their voices; and how would I answer their questions? No, calling wouldn't work. "I could write them a letter," I said thoughtfully. My mom had, used to have, me write to my gramma every month. "You could put it in the mail," I said slowly.

"Ok."

I looked at Beta in surprise. "Ok?" I didn't even realize I spoke out loud.

"Yes, in exchange for you leading the guards. I will give you everything you already asked for, as well as this new thing. As you've pointed out already, you lead them anyway. I will make you captain of the guards, the regular guards. We can't tell Alpha, though. You will ensure that when the time comes, they will follow you in supporting me as alpha. Together we will attack Alpha, the guards wearing him down so I can kill him. This is how leadership is transferred in the pack. I must be the one to kill him. You must promise to never attack me though. I am the heir. This territory is mine. You must guard me, ensuring my safety at all times."

Kill Alpha? I could only stare, finally giving him a nod without really thinking about it.

Beta let out a relieved sigh, then gave me that stupid smile of his. "Take the clothes off and become wolf. I want to show you something."