The Optimist

ten

Nadia

. . .

"Nate, are you sure you're ready?" I ask him one more time. 

Though it's his secret, I'm twice as nervous for my brother and how our parents will take the news of his sexuality. With huge, loving hearts, I'm sure they won't care and instead support him. Right? My grandmother would kill if she knew Nathan was in love with boys, but her child, my mom, is the opposite.

"Yes, now come on." He nags, waiting at my door inpatiently. I slip on my fuzzy, boot-like house shoes and hurriedly exit my room, passing Nathan up. It's my turn to look back at him impatiently as I turn the table. I almost kill myslef trying to make it to the bottom of the stairs, but when I finally meet the ready eyes of Nathan, I know I survived.

Though the walk to my parents room is only thirty six steps away (I counted once!), it feels like one hundred. He steps a bit in front of me, his loose white sgirt swifting with each step. The awkrward, anxious air between us arises and suffocates me. I feel obligated to say something, that is, until we finally reach the door of my parents' bedroom.

"You wanna knock?" Nathan asks. I knew it! Behind those ready eyes and prepared smile, Nathan is all but anticipted for this moment, as am I. He looks at the door, and then me, and then back at the door expectantly.

"You're the one telling them, right?" I reply. He shrugs and nods with a small msile.

Still optimistic like Jacob, yet still my charming brother.

I smile to myself at his goofiness as he slips the loose white tee over his head, throwing it on the ground next to him. He pounds his fists against his chest wildly and pretends to eat a banana.

"What are you doing?" I laugh.

"Preparaing myse-" He gets cut off by a fairly recognizable voice from the other sdie of the door.

"Nathan, honey, is that you?" I stop giggling and he freezes, his eyes widening.

We exchange quick glances as Mom asks again. "Y-yes, it's me Mom1" He says, his voice a shaky vibration. I can hear Mom's smile as she says "well come in, honey."

He looks at me expectantly, eyes the door, and does it again. I open the door and stand beihnd Nathan as he laughs nervously.

"H-hey Mom.." He trails off and from behind his tall structure, I can see Mom and Dad giving him funny looks. "You okay?" Mom unwraps herself from around Dad, ending their cuddle session. Natan nods,a little to hard and long. 

I sigh loudly behind him as he steps in more. "What do you need, Nate?" Dad's firm voice booms a little. He coughs and Mom rubs imaginary circles in his chest to soothe it. "I-I, N-nadia, I mean I wanna.. have to tell you guys something." He stumbles over his words, earning more funny glances from tem.

"Spit it out sweetie, come on." Mom cooes. I keep my head down and step behind hiim. I stand on my tip toes a it and whisper words of encourgament, a rare action. "It's okay, just tell them." I say. I fall back on my feet and step behind him.

"Mom." He says, clearing his throat. She raises a brow as he looks at Dad. "Dad." He says. Dad looks at him expectantly.

"I'm gay." 

Silence. A dead, eerie silence. I clear my throat, breaking the silence and step up to help him.

"Yes, and I'm here to say that I am proud of my brother for coming out to you guys. He was very nervous, more than you guys will ever know, but I told him to come here and admit it." I say. Nathan nods silently next to me, but he looks down. "I like boys." He mumbles.

Mom's face contorts into heavy confusion as she flips her feet over the edge bed. I stand up tall and proud against my slouched, nervous brother. His mood is obliviously drained from their lack of emotion and he stands slupmed over a few feet away from her bed as Mom inspects his backside.

"Well, you are wearing a bit tighter jeans." She mumbles. Mom slowly walks over to Nate, pressing her hands around his face as she slowly inspects it. Nathan giggles. "Mom, what are you-"

"It's a phase. " She says, lowering  her arms from his face. You'll get over it. Now, go sleep it off anf we'll discuss this in the morning." Mom says. Dad is silent, but he's thinking. Mom twists us around, shooing us out of her room hurriedly before slamming the door shut behind us.

I sigh and look at Nathan. "Nathan, I'm sure they're just-"

"Planning my damn fate." Nathan interrupts before walking away. I watch from a slouched posture as he trudges up the stairs, heavy step after heavy step. I'm slightly shcoked at his sudden choice of words, but being optimtic comes with a moody price. You can't be happy, forvever.

"Nathan.." I call, but intentionally not loud enough.

A door slam.

I sigh and look at my pareant' bedroom door one mroe time before headinh up to my own room. I look through my library, taking out a book I kept hidden for moments like this. Savannah's Story, a sappy love story about a bisexual and a lesbian and thier struggles to cope with society's view of them while their wroking a fight to get married as an LGBT couple. Inspiring, very, but I need the words from this book to encourage Nathan.

In the story, the girls' relationship was threatened, adored, approved by some and despised by some, but Savannah, the main, anxious pratagonists copes to the pressure thanks to a few special words from Melizza.

"You're only one, and ypu can be you. This may not make sense now, but you'll understand as our relationship grows." Melizza promises. When it finally hit Savannah about what she meant, her world is a constant rotation of unexpected events and a possible pregnancy. Then the story ends right there.

I was left just as confused as any other would be, but my anger fades as Jacob pops in my mind. He's a merciless, heartless freak and I'm one hundred and fifty percent sure he never waited for me after school. A part of my mind nags at me to open the book and ignore gulity feeling, and the other is telling me that he's somewhat connected to me, closer than I think.

I shake away the feeling and open the book, adjusting my glasses over my nose.

Overweight, hideous, geeky, or gay, I love him the same everyday.

. . .

(A/N) Hopefully I can update twice tomorrow for you guys. Maybe I should write Savannah's story as a real story :) Anyways, thanks for all the love guys! I apprectie it more than you think.