Find your Voice

Chapter 3: Home or Hell?

Chapter 3: Home or Hell?

I decided not to go home right away. Ha, home...that place wasn't home. It was a place of torture and pain. I would rather sleep outside in the park then go back to that place and face those people....monsters. Home was a place where you could feel safe, where you could be yourself. Not where you were constantly afraid. No that house wasn't home, it was my own personal hell. Maybe if I stayed away long enough they would be passed out by the time I got home...I could only hope. I sat and watched the ducks in the pond at the park until it started to get dark and I started to get very hungry. I hadn't eaten breakfast or lunch. I got up and reluctanly started to walk to the hell hole that is my house. I silently bypassed the front door and walked around to my bedroom window. I really didn't want to confrontation that I knew would happen if they saw me. I took the screen off my window and crawled inside then turned and started to put the screen back when I was grabbed from behind and thrown to my back. I stared at James hovering above me looking extremely angry. "Babe! He's back and guess what I caught him doing!" He yelled and my mother ran into the room. "He took his screen off the window and snuck in here! That's how he's getting in and out without us seeing him!" He put his foot on my chest and pressed down slightly making me grunt. "Please..." I whimpered and he pressed harder. 

"You son of a bitch!" My mother yelled and reached down grabbing a handfull of my hair. James removed his foot and my mom pulled my head up. I grabbed her arm and winced as she hanked my head back. "You know better than to lock your fucking door!"

"I-I'm sorry...please I won't do it again!" I pleaded and she threw my head back and scoffed. 

"You're damn right you won't!" She nodded to James who smiled evily at me. My eyes widened as he walked over and kicked my stomach with his boot. I yelled in pain and clutched my midsection as he grabbed my arms and pulled me up. He half dragged me out of my room and into the hallway. "NO!" I cried and struggled but he kept his hold on me, my mother following us smiling the entire time. He dragged me to the closet I dreaded so much and threw me inside slamming and locking the door behind him. I got up and went to the doorknob wiggling it frantically. "Let me out! Please!" I cried and pounded on the door but no one came to help, no one cared. I slid down to the floor and put my face in my hands. Why did they hate me so much? What did I do to make them hate me? I should never have been born...it would have been easier on everyone. My mother would be happy and my father would probably be in the picture. Even kids at school would be happier if I wasn't there. I was pulled from thought by the sound of hammering. I put my ear to the door listening, trying to figure out what they were doing out there. I sighed and pulled my shirt up looking at the bruise forming where James had kicked me. Not as bad as I thought. Good. Eventually I passed out from emotional exhaustion. 

The closet door opened and I woke up. "Get up." James ordered and I obeyed wincing a little as I stood. He grabbed my arm roughly and pulled me out of the closet. I had no idea what time it was but I knew it was late. He led me to my bedroom and shoved me inside. I immediatley looked to the window that was now boarded up. "Do you see what you've forced us to do?" He sneered. I looked back at him and saw the door was different. There was no lock on the inside anymore. "You can't lock your door anymore. You made this happen Scott." He said in frustration. He walked over to me and I backed up until I was pressed against the wall. "You remember your place, or do I have to remind you?" He was right in my face now and he had a hold of my shirt.

"N-no...I know my place..." My voice was shaky.

"Good. You're such a little bitch you know that..." He chuckled then turned and walked out slamming the door. I held back tears and grabbed my stomach as it growled loudly. No food today I guess. I looked around my room...shook my head. Now I had no way of keeping them out of my room, I had no way of keeping myself safe. At least I could still get out of my room if I needed to and odds were they'd be passed out a lot so they wouldn't know if I left. 

I looked at my clock. 1am. I changed and got in bed still trying to hold back my tears but I couldn't. They came like a crazy unstoppable rain. I pulled the covers over my head and pulled my knees to my chest. This isn't how life was supposed to be...I felt like a prisoner in my own home.