14. Accept Help or Rob Your Brother?

6 2 0
                                    

***This is a really long one today guys, it's something I really struggle with so I'm just gonna lay it out there and see how it goes. Hopefully it can help someone else struggling in the area!

I'm gonna break it down into 3 parts!!***

Part 1
——————
I have a hard time accepting certain things. The main categories I can break it down into is:
1. Help from others
2. Compliments
3. Gifts

I really struggle. And it's not just negatively affecting me and my spiritual walk, but it can negatively impact the person extending those things. Let me explain.

1. I don't like accepting help, I have a serious "I can do it all by myself!" attitude and it's really just pride. It's one thing to be hardworking and independent and be proud of that, that's ok, but it's another thing entirely to never accept help or to think too highly of yourself and put too much emphasis on what you've accomplished.

Pride can be a real issue if it goes unchecked, it takes away from what God has done in your life. Pride elevates you in your own mind and distances you from God, it's kind of an arrogance really. As if you don't need Him or as if everything you've accomplished isn't a gift from Him.

There are over thirty verses on pride that I want to include right here..I'm having a hard time narrowing it down! But the main takeaway is that we must remain humble and remember that we are nothing but what God allows us to be. I'm not strong because of me, I'm strong because God made my body this way. But when I'm refusing someone's help with an issue, solely because of my pride (which they don't know about), it can come off so wrong. Like if I clearly need help, and I refuse their offer, it sends a signal of "you're not good enough. You're not wanted. I can't use you." On top of that, maybe God is working on that person to reach out and help their fellow humans more, but I robbed them of an opportunity to obey God! And if they miss that opportunity, man who knows what will happen. Maybe that was their one shot at obedience and trusting God. You don't know what people are going through. I feel very guilty over this because I can recall several times in my life when I tried to help someone, and got shot down real hard. It made me feel very inadequate, so I know unwillingly I have done that to others.

Now when people offer me help, I always immediately thank them for offering, and maybe compliment the willingness to help. I might be able to do it on my own just fine but I let them hold the door or offer their own advice or whatever the situation calls for. It's usually something small, but they feel involved and they were doing something good. Just one tiny, kind, obedient thing to feel proud of. Something they can build on, obedience doesn't happen overnight. It takes baby steps!

Imagine if God was urging you to help someone struggling to carry something, but they refused. You would feel awkward and useless and be less likely to offer help to the next person! Or what if someone was struggling to understand how to make a situation work, and you had already been through it, so you wanted to tell them how to best solve this problem to save time and money. Yet they immediately said no no I'm good, I'm fine I can do it myself. That leaves you frustrated and sad for this person. Less likely to help the next guy. How can you be courageous to be obedient with big things if you've never been very successful with small things?

My main point: When we don't accept help, we rob someone of their opportunity to obey God. And God says quite clearly that He loves obedience.

1 Samuel 15:22
Samuel replied, "What is more pleasing to the LORD: your burnt offerings and sacrifices or your obedience to his voice? Listen! Obedience is better than sacrifice, and submission is better than offering the fat of rams."

It doesn't matter if you truly need the help. At the very least, acknowledge their obedience, we are called to encourage one another! (1 Thessalonians 5:11 Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.)

And when you do need help, it is ok to admit it. It doesn't make you weak, ironically pride is a weakness. No man can do it all alone, that's why we have our communities and are called to love and help one another.

I will leave you with a few verses on pride.

Jeremiah 9:23
This is what the LORD says: "Let not the wise boast of their wisdom or the strong boast of their strength or the rich boast of their riches,

Philippians 2:3
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves,

Proverbs 11:2
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom.

Proverbs 16:18
Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall

Galatians 6:3
For if anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself.

Galatians 6:14
But may it never be that I would boast, except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, through which the world has been crucified to me, and I to the world

Psalm 10:3-4
The wicked are proud of their evil desires;
the greedy curse and reject the Lord.
The wicked do not care about the Lord;
in their pride they think that God doesn't matter.

1 Peter 5:5
Likewise, you who are younger, be subject to the elders. Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble."

Volume 2Where stories live. Discover now