rush//5SOS

28

Ashton had agreed to watch this time, Calum, Luke and Freya all in the gym. After the damage to her body, she was struggling a lot but the two boys were nothing but supportive.

He was glad they were helping her, because otherwise she'd slip back to thinking she was alone.

Calum mainly just went to the gym to maintain what he'd done, and he went everyday so he took it upon himself to help the other two.

"You have to breathe Freya," he reminded, holding her feet as she did sit ups. He watched her red face huff and puff, pushing her body back down to the floor so she stopped.

"You're not gonna be able to jump in and train like I do, you have to take it in baby steps so you don't overwork yourself,"

"I'm not,"

"Go and sit with Ashton, and have a drink. We're almost done,"

She stumbled to her feet and slumped next to Ashton, tears burning her eyes. He gave her some water and rested his hand on the bottom of her back, sensing her sadness.

"You did really well out there,"

"I've ruined everything. I mean, look at Luke. He can run for as long as Calum, and lift weights, and I can't,"

"So how did you 'ruin everything' ?"

"By taking the drugs,"

"And why did you do that?"

"Because I had no control, and I was alone, and gullible,"

"So you need to take grasp of what you have control on. Calum will help you pick up the pace, and when you're back you could even get a trainer, but your appearance is what you can control. This isn't a 'look how much I have to work on' this is a 'look how much I can improve' ,"

"I'll be improving forever,"

"And you'll be recovering forever,"

"What can I even control?"

"I'm asking you,"

Freya thought, looking back up to the boys. Luke was struggling too by this point, but he looked cute. His hair was all messy, and his smile was charming. She lost track of her thought, just wanting him.

"I think we'll talk about this later," Ashton said, following her gaze to the young boy, "you three need to get showered,"

They followed him back to their rooms, each calling a nurse to wait while they showered

Ashton waited for Freya, cleaning up her room a little and turning on her heating. The water stopped, so he waited for her to come out.

However, a frustrated groan had him knocking on her door.

He went in and saw her hair in a mess, before she walked straight past him.

"Do you want me to do your hair?"

"Yes please,"

"I'll teach you one day,"

"Why do you all know how to do it here?"

"Some people get frustrated by their hair. Especially when you first come in, you don't get up to shower either so putting your hair like this puts it out the way and keeps it from getting matted,"

"So you just all know how to do it?"

"Yes," he said, tying up the plait and starting the next one, "have you thought about control yet?"

"I can't,"

"It doesn't have to be a big thing. You can control what food you eat outside, and you can decide what books you read, and when you go to bed, and what classes you want to take,"

Freya hugged her knees to her chest, not moving when Ashton finished her hair. She couldn't make herself think like that, but then again everyone seemed to be miserable.

Media was always moaning about things they can't have, then only showing the best parts. She was guilty of that herself.

She couldn't help but wonder if her dad had any updates, or what he'd think about her reading and wanting to study. Modelling or acting was something he'd always wanted her to do, but now she wanted to focus on something else.

It felt unnatural to be thinking about a future, because it had just been handed to her.

"Luke is gonna come down in a bit," Ashton told her, snapping her out of her thoughts, "Are you okay?"

"Has my dad been told anything?"

"He's been given updates every week, but nothing detailed,"

"I don't think he'd be proud of me, because I don't want to do what he wants me to,"

"If he isn't proud of you then it's not worth wasting your energy. I'll be proud, you'll find friends who are proud, Calum and Luke will be proud. Most importantly, you'll be proud,"