rush//5SOS

23

Ashton smiled when he walked in to see his patient fully immersed in the book. Not wanting to interrupt, he sat quietly on a chair and read through some notes.

"What?" she exclaimed, "they can't do that,"

He looked up, amused.

"Ashton, they can't do this,"

"Their book, their choice,"

"I wish that applied to life,"

"You don't think it does?" he asked curiously. The girl shook her head.

"The only choice I've ever made is to take that one drug, and it sent me down a spiral which I didn't feel in control of. Being the youngest, my family make all the decisions for me,"

"I'm sure you've made more than one decision before,"

"No. It's like I'm a character in a book, the thing already written out for me. I literally don't see myself getting any better,"

"If you think like this, you won't,"

"I can't think like a normal person," she said, getting frustrated, "I'm literally here, there's no way I'm normal,"

"Freya, don't say that about yourself,"

"But it's true," she trembled, folding her page and putting the book down.

"You maybe don't see, but you've recovered so much since you got here, and I only see it getting better. Nothing is written out, because you do get to choose- even if you haven't before, the choice is yours. It's your choice if you're gonna work with me and get better, and it's your choice to how you go about things now,"

"I do want to , but it's so hard,"

"And I appreciate that, but you're gonna have to push through,"

"Why are you still nice to me?"

"I think you've learnt well enough that nastiness gets you no where,"

Freya bit her lip, sinking back under her duvet and shrugging. She knew it was true, and she knew she had been awful, but she didn't know how to make up for it.

For the first time in a while, she felt guilty.

"What's playing on your mind?"

"How do I make it up to you?"

"I tell you what, if you agree that we are gonna work on a more positive mindset, I will forgive you,"

"Deal," the girl said instantly, " sorry... I just- I really want myself to get better,"

"It's ok," Ashton laughed, "so do I,"

The pair of them talked for a while longer, just about things Freya enjoyed because it was important to have a bond.

Luke and Calum were also talking, Naomi doing paperwork but not really listening in.

"Cal, I don't want to go to the gym anymore but I think Michael will get upset,"

"Why don't you want to go?"

"I just don't, okay?"

"Talk to Michael then," Calum mumbled. His patience was wearing thin with Luke, because he was nothing but nice yet an attitude always came back.

"Have you been taking your medicine?"

"Yes," Luke said defensively, "have you?"

"Yeah,"

"I can't eat this food," Luke groaned, falling back on the bed and suddenly starting to cry.

Naomi looked up, walking over to the boy and taking his plate away.

"Luke, would you come with me to see a doctor or would it have to be Michael?"

"Michael," he whined, "why?"

"To check if you're healthy. You should have gained a lot of weight in the past month, and I've also got super close to some medicine that will stop you feeling so anxious,"

"Really?"

"Really,"

"I'll have that,"

Calum chuckled, patting the boys back and finishing his plate of food. He felt a lot of accomplishment for himself, and Naomi did too.

"Calum, I'm gonna be right back. You've done well today,"

"I have?"

"Yeah. If you want to ring someone from home, go and ask the receptionist,"

He stood up excitedly, taking the small token which meant he could use the phone.

As much as he wanted to make up to his mum, talking to his sister was his main goal now.

After a few moments of static, her voice appeared.

"Calum?"

"Mali, I missed you,"

"How are you? It's been a while,"

"Five months. I'm one of the oldest, but I don't feel ready and neither does Naomi. I almost am, maybe a couple of months,"

"No, it's ok. My apartment is always available when you are. Is Luke doing good?"

"Not really. I don't think he's taking his medicine," he said sadly. Any annoyance he felt washed away, because he knew how Luke felt.

This place, no matter how nice everyone was, you didn't ever feel normal.