Deranged

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Hold my hand and walking me over there,

Give me over and tell them what to do,

I won’t fight, I promise,

Don’t say goodbye, and don’t tell me you love me, just leave,

I’ll find a way to go on,

Let them strip me of all I have, 

My insecurities, my self-consciousness, my emotions,

Even my dignity, the little endurance and self-control I had left within,

I want them to put me in a hospital gown, a white one with blue polka dots,

Tie my wrists together and put my hair in a ponytail,

Then walk me through the halls of grown adults and teenagers, who are either sucking their thumb curled in ball or speaking to the walls,

Let them open the door to my big spongy room and walk me in,

Close the doors forever, 

Let me drown in my thoughts, let the guilt eat my soul, let me lay there empty and confused,

Won’t be any different from when I was home,

Let the people in my head speak all at once and I’ll lay there, and cry and scream on the top of my lungs for you to come back and give me just a little bit of your heart,

But you shouldn’t come back, 

You can’t, because I told you not to,

This is where I belong, 

In a mental asylum, it isn’t your fault love, it’s all mine,

And that’s because I am a deranged.

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