Oak Ridge

sunday. july 7

I've always thought there was something about this mountain that made you forget. It's like whatever has happened in the past year just fades away and you get to start over. Anyone can be whoever they want up here and for most people that means being their true self. There's no pressure. Everyone feels free to be who they are.

Well, everyone except me.

"Hey, Chase!" Myles brings me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah, man?"

I look up from my lunch tray.

"Whatcha doin' here just sittin' by yourself?"

"Oh," I say, looking around. "Guess no one wants to sit with me."

"Well I am."

"Thanks."

Myles starts eating his lunch and I sit quietly, looking out the window. It would've been fine if he hadn't sat down, honestly. I've had a lot on my mind today.

"So what'd you think about Mallory's big show yesterday?" He asks.

My eyes don't move from the window. "Honestly, good for her, you know? She knew how she felt and knew she could tell everyone without us judging her."

"You good, man? You seem kinda upset."

"I'm fine."

"You sure? I mean if something's bothering you—"

"Myles, I said I was fine," I snap. "Just drop it!"

I get up and throw my plate away and head outside. I wasn't hungry anyway. Deciding just to go ahead and set up the games, I walk down the gravel path to the Main Lodge. There's still about an hour left for lunch and there's no way I'm going back in there after I blew up on Myles.

After I finish setting up, I hear heavy footsteps on the stairs outside. I look up to see Princeton walking through the door.

"Hey," he greets.

"Hi."

"Chase, I want you to talk to me," he sighs. "I saw you snap on Myles earlier and I just wanna know what's up with you. You just don't see as happy as you usually are. I mean, you're Dimples! You have to smile to be Dimples and you're not. We're worried about you."

"What do I have to smile for, Prince? My life is a wreck," I smile sadly.

"What do you mean? I thought you talked to Mal about all of this. What's going on?"

"I can't tell you," I say under my breath.

"Okay absolutely no more of this cryptic, secretive bullshit," Princeton demands. "I'm sick and tired of it. I'm gonna need you to tell me what's wrong. I'm over all of this—"

"Princeton—"

"No! You just listen for a second. What is it with you people this year, coming up here and acting so weird with all the secrets and lies and—"

"I'm gay!"

Princeton stops mid sentence, mouth still open. Honestly, I'm shocked too. I can't believe I actually said that. His face goes back to normal and he drops his arms that he was waving around.

"What?"

I nod. "I'm gay."

"And you felt like you couldn't tell me that because," he trails off, expecting an answer.

"I thought y'all would judge me. Maybe think I was different or something, I don't know." I shake my head.

"You're still the same Chase we've known forever," he says. "This doesn't make you any different."

"Yeah, I realize that now."

"Well what made you decide to tell me now?"

"Mallory yesterday. I mean she just went for it and didn't care about what anyone thought," I say. "I don't know why I thought y'all wouldn't accept me or anything."

"Have you told anyone else?"

"Nope, you're the first."

"What about Olivia?"

Oh yeah, her.

"We broke up the day I got back from camp last year," I say. "Sorry, I lied about us still being together."

"Nah, man it's cool." Princeton smiles. "Sorry you felt like you couldn't tell us. I support you, though, a hundred percent. You're still my brother."

"Thanks, Prince."

The bell outside rings for the campers to go to their activities. Princeton nods and goes to leave.

"Princeton!"

"Yeah?"

"I know you don't like the secrets, but could you please not tell anyone?"

"Don't worry, man. This is a little different. I won't tell, I promise."

He smiles again and walks out the door.

◾️◾️◾️

"Alright, guys. This was a big decision and I hope you guys are alright with who I chose."

Eric kept us all after Camp Meeting tonight to tell us who will be speaking during Focus Week. All of us look around at each other, I guess trying to see each other's reaction. Mary Anne's face is stark white as she grips Myles' hand.

"Well, who's it gonna be?" Blake breaks the silence.

"Princeton will speak."

What?

"Really?" Princeton furrows his brows. "Why?"

"We thought you might be able to provide the best closing message," Eric says. "Overcoming obstacles, defying the odds. It's also your last year with us and you've never shared your story with the campers."

"Yeah, but Eric my story really isn't all that important," Princeton argues. "I mean, a lot of kids this year have opened up about losing their parents! Wouldn't you rather have Myles speak?"

"I chose you for a reason. You will be speaking and that's my decision. Now you guys go back to your cabins and get to bed. Start thinking about your speech, Princeton."

We all get up from our seats and head for the door. I notice Mary Anne and Myles pull off to the side and start talking in whispers. Everyone seems kind of shocked that Princeton was chosen to speak. Especially himself.

Isn't the point of the speaker to talk about things in their life that the campers need to hear? Something they can relate to? True, everyone needs a lesson about overcoming challenges, but every single one of us has done that in one way or another!

It's alarming, the number of kids who've lost their parents in the past couple of years. We all thought for sure Myles was gonna be picked. Hell, Mary Anne was probably growing some gray hair over it.

I notice that Princeton has beaten me to Scotch Pine. He's sitting on the steps when I walk up, looking out into the woods next to White Oak.

"You okay?" I ask, sitting down.

"There are other people here who could make a bigger difference than me. I mean, these campers have all kinds of stories. They've lost parents, they've been abused, they have actual problems. They need to hear Myles. They need to hear Mary Anne and Blake. They don't need me."

"I hate to say that I agree, but I do. Eric is off on this one."

"I have to find a way to fix this," he says, shaking his head. "These kids need to hear their stories."