Okay, I am not too sure where to start with how life is going.
First off, last week was probably one of the most emotional weeks of my life. I lost two friends that week and I saw them that same week as well.
Having people you know and love being broken hurts so much, worse than a stab wound.
I am writing this to tell whoever is reading this that if you have this gut feeling to say hi to someone or give them a hug, to go for it.
I personally saw my friend last week and I had a gut feeling to say hi and give her a hug, but I told myself "Nah, I'm going to see her again I'll just say hi to her then," and the next couple days after she passes away and I instantly regret it.
That entire week I was questioning to God why he's doing the things he is, taking two lives away from this world at such an early age.
It hurts seeing everyone hurt.
I cried so much everyday of last week.
Life has changed and everything is different, it may not seem like it, but it is truly different.
After having that urge and regretting it, I had another urge.
All day I was contemplating whether or not to call this one person who really hurt me deeply, but I'm always going to care about them no matter what.
In the morning I woke up and was thinking to calling them right then and there but it was too early for that and I told myself to keep thinking about it throughout the day to do it or not.
I started freaking out because I know the right thing to do was to just make that phone call.
I told my friend about my urge and she said go for it. It's not that easy though when this person was talking bad upon you and you just act like you don't know about it.
I called him up.
He answered.
We talked, he caught up on life to the point where he wanted the both of us to go together, anywhere, and move and start new to get out of this city.
I can only dream about his wish coming true.
I wish it would come true one day, but we don't have "that relationship" anymore, as in no more feelings towards each other affectionately anymore.
At the end of the day I am glad I made the right call to call him or else I'll probably regret not doing so later on.
I do miss him though and I wish the best for him.
- M.
