Secrets | Zayn Malik

» [33] Are we? «

december 8 

I tilted my head slightly off to the side trying to remember if I'd seen this guy before. Tall, had to be at least six foot and over with light and dark brown curls resting on top of his head. His facial hair was growing in but it looked to be just slight stubble at the moment but the more I stared at him it was like his smile kept getting bigger. He had nice lips and smile lines on both sides of his cheeks but damn his neck was literally the same size as his head. 
"Um," I laughed uncomfortably, his cologne still lingering in the air as I gripped the box tighter. "Do I know you?"
He shrugged and closed his lips together, still grinning like a cheesy fuck but hiding his extremely white teeth. "Oh shit. You probably have no idea who I am," he rubbed the back of his neck now and glanced past me for a second or so. "I'm Xavier -- uh, actually. You probably know me by Nick, short for Nicholas, which is my middle name that I like to be called more than my actual first name. I, uh, I have painting with you back at Boulder."
Raising my eyebrows, I studied him harder and swore on my life I'd never seen him attend class once. "Mr. Brown's class?"
He nodded. "Yeah, that's my bad. Sorry; I -- you've just kind of been the talk around campus but I've never been," he stopped talking and if I looked close enough, underneath his somewhat tan complexion his cheeks were turning a shade of pink. "Sorry--"
"You don't have to keep apologizing Nicholas, who likes to be called Nick but whose real name is actually Xavier," I smiled at him, wondering why the hell he would introduce himself to me now, here in the middle of some gas station with me holding a box of pregnancy tests when he had the opportunity to do so before. Holding my right hand out he seemed hesitant to take it in at first. "I'm Maci, but obviously you already know that. It's nice to meet you."
"Yeah, you too."
"Tell me Nick," I took my hand back after he shook it and stepped around him in an effort to end the conversation. Taking a few steps forward in the direction of the bathroom I turned to face him one last time. "You always wear this much cologne?"
"If I'm being honest with you I smoked a fat blunt this morning and didn't have time to go home and change."
I nodded and just laughed to myself, clutching the cardboard box close to my chest. "I'll see you around."
"Is it so bad that you're walking away?"
I held the box of pregnancy tests up in the air with my back turned to him and heard him laugh from a few feet away before I turned the corner to the bathroom entrance. I shook my head once more and almost ran straight into Harry who stood against the wall just beside the door with his hands in his jacket pockets. 
"You get his number while you were back there?"
"Oh please," I flipped my hair to the side. "Zayn might actually murder him."
"Better tell lover boy that," Harry nodded his head past me and I looked over my shoulder to see Nick staring at me just from the corner of his eye. I caught his gaze and quickly he looked away and picked up a small pack of snacks to look occupied. "His name's Nick. Likes to smoke and over do it with the cologne but apparently we have painting together back at school."
"Is he single?" Harry straightened up now and ran his fingers through his hair.
"Why don't you ask him?"
"Do you think he's interested?"
I grabbed hold of his forearm and gripped tightly. "Like I said, why don't you go ask him yourself?"

45 minutes later 

I sat in the back seat of Harry's car, my face pale and my entire body frozen as if someone had hit a bad nerve wrong in my spine and paralyzed me for eternity. My heart was beating at a slow pace surprisingly but I could feel my feet tingling the longer I sat here, a clear sign that I needed to get off my ass and out of this car.

"Maci."
"Hmm," I answered knowing fully well that both Harry and Liam were turned around in their seats to look at me. 
"We've been sitting here for a good twenty minutes." Which was completely true, however we were secluded from the busy city just outside and a good five minute walk to a fancy golden door that was an entrance to the hotel Zayn and I happened to be staying at.
"Did you take a picture?" 
I widened my eyes at this and gawked at Harry, my jaw dropping a little. "Do you think I'm that stupid?"
In defense he stared back at me and held his hands up. "Just a question."
"No," I breathed out, my brows furrowing as I heaved my legs onto the seat and crossed them on top of each other. To my right side just a few inches away sat the same pink box except this time the top was ripped open and inside contained two sticks that had been peed on but was washed off and wrapped in multiple layers of toilet paper before being stuffed back quickly into the box because at that point I wasn't even concerned about them anymore.
"Why would you be stupid for taking a picture?" Liam asked innocently and I had to smile at him because poor, poor Liam. We hooked up twice, the first one being completely desperate I want to say but he barely knew me and here he was pulled neck deep into the shit that both Harry and I had been through, something I was still going through.
"Mate we're talking about Zayn here. For all we know he's gone through her phone already and looked through the messages we've sent her. Shit knowing him, sooner or later he'll have known the three of us sat here in this garage talking about a pregnancy test," Harry paused, trailing off slowly and obviously wanting me to finish the sentence but I stayed quiet.
"Which obviously, came out positive. You're as pale as a ghost, Maci," Liam said slowly.
I took in a deep breath, glanced at my stomach for a few seconds before returning my gaze to Harry and Liam who continued to stare at me silently, their eyes piercing into me with an urgency to find out how I was truly feeling, especially Liam. 
"The tests came out with two lines, so obviously yeah. But the second line was super faded," I spoke in an attempt to reassure myself that this couldn't be real.
"But you took both of them."
I nodded. "That's right."
"Why did you take the box with you?" Liam nodded towards the opened box that lay next to me.
"I was scared."
"You were scared to throw them away?"
Harry's eyes got bigger as he nodded his head slowly. "We have no idea if he's sent someone to watch her."
Liam sort of scoffed as he leaned more into his seat. "Why would he send someone to watch her?"
"He left her in the middle of the streets, Liam. Right in the center of Denver itself literally by an alleyway before disappearing to do whatever he needs to get done. No way he would let her wander off by herself without paying some random guy or hiring someone to follow her close to make sure she's okay."
"Still doesn't answer the question though."
"Someone sees her buy a box, disappear into the bathroom and come out empty handed, eyes wide, face blank, cheeks pale. Tell me, if you were being paid an insane amount of money to watch his girl, you'd go in there to see what she went and bought, right? You see the box in the trash can and then if you're smart enough, do the math and report back to the boss. In this case, it would be Zayn."
Liam went to open his mouth as if he was going to say something back but closed it tight. He frowned at this point, his eyes darting from the box to Harry multiple times before replying to him. "Are American men really so uneducated that they've no idea what a pregnancy test looks like from afar? You really think if he -- if this Zayn guy sent someone to follow her and observed her buying this box they would have to go to the bathroom trash to confirm they were actual pregnancy tests?"
Harry sighed and I nodded. "You'd be surprised."
He laughed and shook his head before returning his gaze to me. "Then what difference would it make if you saw her walking out with the same box she went into the bathroom with?"
"Liam, think about what you just said. Think about it real hard."
It didn't take long for him to contemplate on what he had just spoken but I watched him shake his head at Harry before turning to me. "Listen, Maci, you're an intelligent--"
I cut him off and held my hand out. "Don't try and compliment me, Liam. I fucked up and what's even worse is I don't know if it's his or my ex's," I could feel my heart sink to my gut and suddenly I felt sick.
"That's not where I'm going with this. I'm just saying, you're way too smart to be making such a reckless decision," I rolled my eyes and tried to interrupt him but he spoke over me and this I gave him props for. "Look, I don't know either the two of you that well, honestly at all even. But I do know that in most cases with these kinds of relationships, if the other person has the higher hand in almost everything circulating within their affair of sorts, the other is obviously in a disadvantage and it just results in nothing but a toxic mess."
"English, Liam," Harry said.
"No, hang on. I have no idea what you're trying to tell me but right now if I'm being honest with you, someone I feel like I barely know but suddenly feel vulnerable around, at this point I don't even think I have a choice anymore."
"Technically, you still do. Despite that however," Liam took my hand with ease and stared into my eyes. "Tell me you're not scared he's going to do something to you if you tell him something he doesn't want to hear."