Confessions

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I'm sorry I'm not what you want

(Kellin's POV)

I don't think I've ever felt more exhausted.

Despite the pain coursing through my veins and the tiredness I feel, I cannot find the will to sleep.

I've been laying on my living room floor, in too much pain to actually walk upstairs to my room. The pain makes me feels numb until I move slightly and feel another stab of pain snap through my body.

The floor is uncomfortable and cold, I shiver thinking about how warm Vic's hands were.

I shake that thought out of my head and think of my boyfriend, and how much I missed him. I was in pain and needed comfort, yet he wasn't here.

'Hey'

I texted him, feeling lonely and looking to be consoled.

He texted back almost immediately.

'Hi.'

His text felt empty and cold, the single word text held more meaning than it should.

'I'm so sorry, I'm so dumb. Can you ever forgive me?'

I shivered, feeling numb to the world yet freezing. My hands shook but getting off the floor wasn't an option. I didn't deserve to be warm.

'Sure'

His texts made me feel like crying, I knew I upset and embarrassed him but I needed him.

'Please Daniel, I love you'

I felt desperate, I felt as if he was slipping away from me, I couldn't let the best thing in my life leave me.

'I'm coming over'

I sighed out, relieved that he was at least coming here. I needed him, he couldn't leave me. I know how terrible I am to him but I try my best.

I set my phone beside me and place my head in my hands. That action itself makes me dizzy and I let out a sob. I'm so tired, I need Daniel here.

My phone clock says 2:36 when I hear the door open, the phone is still cold from when I was outside and I assume it'll die soon.

I'm still lying on the floor when Daniel finds me in the living room, he pulls me up into a sitting position, I try not to groan in pain.

"Why the fuck are you on the floor? You knew I was coming." He says angrily, I feel my eyes watering and my lip trembling.

"I'm sorry," I say, feeling terrible. "It just hurts to sit."

His brow furrows, and I feel afraid. His features in this light look menacing. I just want my Daniel, not this.

"Your so stupid." He mumbles before kissing me.

It hurts, I groan from pain into his mouth but he just continues, most likely thinking it was from enjoyment not pain.

He soon was on top of me and I just felt so uncomfortable from all the bruises on my body.

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