I Just Want To Be Someone. Klance AU

Chapter 2

"Homework?" I glanced up at my Geography teacher and reached into my bag. I fumbled around for a minute or so until I pulled out a piece of paper that had gotten a bit creased beneath my books. I flattened it out with my hands before giving it to my teacher. Her eyebrows raised and she hid a smile as she took it. I was slightly offended at her shock but then I remembered that I literally never handed in work and, honestly, I was surprised too.

The teacher continued around the room until she had a pile of papers in her hands. She placed them down onto her desk and then began the lesson. I tried my hardest to pay attention but it was kind of hard when I didn't care about tourism or whatever we were learning about. I just balanced my head on my hands and stared out of the window into the playground.

It seemed kind of ominous. Fog lingered in the air, meaning the end of the field just fizzled out into the mist. The trees were swaying slightly in the wind and it seemed like the perfect scene to set a horror movie. I could almost imagine a doll sat on one of the swings that appeared to be swinging itself. Maybe a clown should stand on the middle of the grass with the fog enveloping them like a hug. The playground just looked so lonely and sad when it wasn't filled with hyper kids, running around and screaming their little heads off. I didn't realise I had completely zoned out until someone called my name. I tore my gaze away from the field and everyone, including the teacher, was staring in my direction.

"Yeah..?" I mumbled because I couldn't even begin to guess what she had been talking to me about. I heard a snicker from behind me but ignored it, red covering my cheeks.

"I asked you a question. You should really listen when I'm trying to teach you."

"Sorry, Miss..."

"See me after class."

I nodded slowly, picking up my pen for the first time in the lesson and starting to copy the notes that were on the board. Was it just a thing that no teachers could write? It was barely legible and even my writing was neater and that's saying something. My handwriting was horrendous.

The lesson passed much slower when I was actually doing work compared to when I was just imagining a horror movie. When the bell actually rang, my head perked up and I immediately started to shove my exercise book into my bag. I hoped to make a quick exit before the teacher saw me but I had to stop when she called my name. I had to avoid rolling my eyes as I stopped in my movements.

"Sit." She simply said. I reluctantly sat down at the front desk, trying my best to keep a straight face and not glare at her. "You really can't afford to daydream in class if you're failing... if this continues, you won't be able to get anything higher than an F in May." May was exam month and it sucked. To be honest, an F would still be a miracle to me.

"An F is better than an ungraded." I muttered beneath my breath. She wasn't meant to hear but apparently she did because she sighed a little too dramatically.

"An F is still a fail, Lance. An F won't get you into university." It was wonderful how she assumed everyone wanted to get into university- not that any job would accept me with so many fails.

"I know..." I glanced down at the table just so I didn't have to look at her disappointed face any longer. "I'm an idiot, I get it. I don't need to be reminded." I got reminded enough by the sarcastic remarks from my friends and then the serious insults from my parents.

"Lance, you are not an idiot. You... just struggle to concentrate and I can see that. I think I'm going to call your parents in so we can have a chat about it."

My eyes widened and I rapidly shook my head. "Please don't bring them into this. I'll try to concentrate, I promise." My voice was full of pathetic desperation. My parents already knew I was failing and they didn't like it. They wanted me to be one of the top students but I was just sat at the bottom, the worst in nearly all of my classes.

"I think it's more than you just having an active imagination," She leaned forward and that look she gave me. It almost looked like sympathy. I did not need her sympathy. "I think you may have ADHD."

"ADHD?" My eyebrows furrowed as I searched her face for any signs she was joking. Surely, if I had ADHD, someone would have noticed by this point? I leant back in my chair and let out a long breath of air.

"Do you know what that is?"

"Of course I do." It was Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. I suppose it would explain a lot about me but I didn't want to have a mental disorder plastered on me. What would my parents think then? I was an idiot, as well as some head case. (Note: these are Lance's thoughts not mine. Having ADHD doesn't class you as 'insane')

"No... uh, I- I have class. I should go." I then shot out of the classroom before my teacher could even think about calling me back. I didn't think I would go to my next class but I just needed any form of excuse to get me out of that classroom. I made it to the boys' toilets at the end of the corridor before I broke down. I hid in a cubicle and sat down on the closed toilet seat, burying my head into my hands. I started to cry to no one but myself, my sobs echoing around the empty toilets. I knew it was unlikely that I'd be bothered because it was lesson time so I didn't bother trying to be quiet.

My parents were going to hate me. In their eyes I was already a failure and their most useless kid so I couldn't even begin to imagine how much they were going to hate me once they found out I could have ADHD. A shiver ran up my spine at the thought as I continued to sob like a baby.

I felt for my phone in my pocket and switched it on with shaky hands. Of course there weren't any messages waiting for me but I opened up the messaging app I used to talk to RedLion2000 and I started to type. I didn't care that he was a stranger: I just needed someone to talk to. He had cheered me up once before and I was sure he'd be able to help again.

Sharpshooter01: I'm so useless...

Sharpshooter01: I think my parents are going to disown me soon

RedLion2000: Kind of in class right now

Sharpshooter01: Oh right sorry

RedLion2000: Talk to me anyway

Sharpshooter01: One of my teachers think I have ADHD and they want to talk to my parents about it. If they find out, they're going to think I'm even more of a failure. I'm already the disappointment of my family.

RedLion2000: They shouldn't think of you as a failure though. It isn't your fault?

Sharpshooter01: Tell them that haha

Sharpshooter01: I'm already enough of a failure to them. Me having some stupid disorder is going to make me seem even more useless

RedLion2000: Having ADHD doesn't make you useless or stupid. It isn't your fault

Sharpshooter01: I really don't want to have to do this anymore

Sharpshooter01: Wouldn't it just be easier for my family if I don't put them through all the hassle of getting me diagnosed?

RedLion2000: Maybe in the short term but it might be helpful in the long term. Don't people with ADHD get meds or whatever? They might help you concentrate and get better grades and stuff

Sharpshooter01: At this point I don't care

RedLion2000: What are you doing right now?

Sharpshooter01: Crying in the boys' toilets at my school as you do

RedLion2000: Oh. Don't you have class?

Sharpshooter01: I'm skipping

RedLion2000: You should get to class. Who knows it might even distract you a bit

Sharpshooter01: Fine...

RedLion2000: This isn't your fault, Sharpshooter. Everything is going to end up okay and you can get through this, alright?

Sharpshooter01: Thanks, RedLion