Our Right Time

Fourteen- What happened?

"Anak, alam mo bang nangyayari sa kapatid mo? Matamlay yata siya this past few days. Hindi rin siya masyadong lumalabas ng kwarto niya't kumakain ng tama. Nag-aalala na ako." I look at my Mom, she looked weary. Me too, Mom. I sigh.

Oh, Lovely. I'm selfish I know. I'm sorry, mahal. I'm sorry. Maiintindihan mo rin ako balang araw. Bata ka pa, you can still find someone new na totoong magmamahal sayo. But it's not Morgan, it's not him. He's mine. Mine alone.

Call her selfish pero mahabang panahon na ang tiniis niya. Oo, immature at nonsense man kung iisipin para sa iba pero hindi sa kanya. She had enough of her. She loves her pero unti-unting natatabunan ang pagmamahal na iyon. Nasa kamay na niya si Morgan and she won't just let him slip that easily.

Alam niya darating ang panahon, Lovely will realize how stupid she was spending time thinking that she loves Morgan. She'll move on.

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Do you remember how you and I were so young and small?

We were always together,

do you remember our friends who were jealous of us?

You held my small hand and protected me, always smiling only at me.

Baby, we didn't know back then,

we were too young.

The moments that they shared together, he protected her towards the loneliness of life. He was always there to make her smile whenever she was sad.

She can still remember the time when he held her hands and told her that everything was okay.

The time that he smiled at her, with that visible affection in his eyes, or just she thought?

You came into my heart

as something more than a friend.

Next to you, I hid my heart,

hiding behind the friend label.

Oo, dumating ito bigla-bigla sa buhay niya, at nakapasok sa batang puso niya.

Matagal siyang nagtago sa tunay niyang nararamdaman dito, tinitiis niya ang hapdi sa puso niya makasama lang ito. She pretended for years being his friend, natuto siyang makuntento na maging kaibigan lamang ito.

We resembled each other so much and you were my precious friend.

Baby, that's what I believed but you came to me and it was so strange.

The very first day that they met, that night that he came and talked to her, it was the same night that she felt her heart doubled its beat. And on days onward after that day, he became her pillar of strength, he became dear to her that she came to the point of loving him.

Honestly, I was afraid.

I wasn't used to my trembling heart when I saw you.

Actually, I resented you for acting like everything was normal

Why didn't you know my heart?

Feel me, tell me, love me.

Oo, natakot ako noong una kong naramdaman na minamahal na pala kita, natakot ako na baka hindi mo kayang suklian ang nararamdamam ko, and I was right.

Naiinis ako sayo kasi you always pretended that you don't like me too pero iba naman ang ipinapakita ng mga mata mo, naiinis ako kasi patuloy pa rin akong umaasa na sana, balang araw lumingon ka man lang at sabihin na ni konti may pag-asa pala ako. Kahit sinabi ko ng mahal kita, wala ka man lang sinabi oh ginawa, kahit na nagmukha akong tanga at katawa-tawa sa paningin mo pero ginawa ko pa rin ang bagay na kinakakatakotan ko, kahit na alam ko na puwede akong mabigo.

Gusto ko lang naman na pagtuonan mo rin ako ng pansin.

Morgan, kahit konti lang. Kahit konti.

I wiped my tears as I removed the earphone in my ears. I just can't stop thinking about him, I just can't get enough of this sweet torture of loving him. Yes, still sweet, kasi kahit anong pilit ko sa sarili ko, napapangiti pa rin ako kapag naiisip ko siya.

I sighed. Bakit ba talaga hindi puwede??? Naguguluhan ako.