After the whole fiasco with the person that broke in we upgraded our security, replaced the things they broke. We also asked the kids if they saw anything or anyone peculiar that night.
They said that nothing was out of the ordinary and that the only people they saw were Shawn and I.
Thank God.
As for my computers, Shawn knew a guy who basically locked those electronics from a secure location. I highly doubt any of the information will be leaked at this point.
Although it was late I couldn't sleep. I had been downstairs for hours looking through the footage trying to figure out who broke in. Although I had ideas of who it could be, I couldn't get a face on who it was.
I grumbled at the frustration I felt. I almost felt defeated but as we all know I don't give up easily.
"Mrs.BB?" A sweet small voice called.
I turned my head to see Sízyire standing by the opening.
"Yes pumpkin"
She was wearing her mini mouse pajama set that she had asked me for a while back.
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I also noticed she was also holding her favorite stuffed animal. A medium sized teddy bear that was baby blue, and had a gold embroidered 'Z' on the heart it held. Shawn had bought all the girls a stuffed animal with their nick names on the hearts of the animals.
"What are you doing up?"
"I couldn't sleep."
I put out my arms gesturing for her to come to me. She rubbed her eyes and walked closer to me. When she was in reach I picked her up and sat her on my lap. She looked like she was fighting her sleep. Laying her head on my chest; I rocked her side to side rubbing her back.
I hummed a hymn until I figured out what I wanted to sing. I quickly decided on singing 'beautiful'. An unreleased song that was purely meant for my kids.
I made it through the first verse and her eyes started to close some. But she didn't fall asleep, instead she asked a question.
"When do you think we'll have a Mommy again?"
I stopped singing and looked down at her, she was staring back at me with hopeful eyes looking for a hopeful answer.
"Honey, you've always had a Mommy. Your biological mother may not be here right now with you, but she is always with you in spirit."
I gave her a slight genuine smile to comfort her. She gave one back and I could see her pondering something in her brain.
"I know she's here in spirit, but for here and in spirit can I call you mommy?"
I was speechless. At this moment I thought about how this will be true validation for her. Not a legal document, not a judge, not a random stranger, but me giving her the three letter word of agreement.
This would also be validation for me. I don't want to take their biological mothers place. Mainly because we still don't know what happened to her and why she gave up her rights over the girls.
However I did want to be someone the girls could count on and know as someone who loves and accepts them.
I looked her straight in the eye and said, "Yes if you truly want me to then of course baby girl."
She popped up and smiled brightly giving me the tightest hug I could possibly receive.
"I love you ZZ."
"I love you too... mommy."
That followed by a faint yawn. "Alright sleepy bug, lets take you upstairs and I'll tuck you in." Once I laid her down she was out in less than 3 minutes.
When I knew she was in deep slumber I walked out having the realization hit me like a refreshing gust of wind. I already have 3 children that I thank god for everyday, and now he's blessed me with 3 more.
No I didn't have Siyeinna, Símya, or Sízyire biologically. But that didn't matter to me, they are still my babies from this moment forward.
I walked back downstairs and cleaned up my mess. I sat down at the counter seat and kept the thought in my head,
