She's Broken

Chapter 11

                “Why was that?” he pushed, his eyes telling me that speaking would make me feel better. It didn’t, but I told him about the night, regardless.

                He listened contently, nodding and making comments where necessary. At first, he said nothing, then, he leaned forward and tried to place a hand on my arm reassuringly. I stiffened, yanking away and shuffling back in the chair. My eyes must’ve been wide with panic because he nodded, sighing.

                “Sweetheart,” he started but I shook my head.

                “Please don’t call me that.” He didn’t ask why, he probably guessed, before continuing.

                “You aren’t going backwards, but you aren’t going forwards, either,” he said, his voice soft like silk as he sat back and tapped his knee. My expression didn’t change, I just looked at him with level eyes.

                “I feel like I am. I went to a party, I told somebody about some things,” I said. His head cocked at that and he nodded, pursing his lips.

                “Who was this?”

                “One of our grooms,” I said eventually, trying to fumble with what to call him.

                “I see. The touching hasn’t made any progress,” he said with a sad note to his voice. I shrugged, fiddling with the hem of my shirt. I told him that I’d try, and I had been, but it wasn’t getting anywhere. It was harder than I had originally thought when I first spoke to him.

                “It’s not as easy as you think,” I mumbled, not meeting his eyes.

                “I know it’s hard, but have you tried?” he asked. My head snapped up and I met his eyes with a nod.

                “It’s harder than you think,” I repeated and he sighed, leaning forwards so that his arms were resting on his thighs.

                “I’ve seen girls like you before, Kathryn, I know it’s hard,” he said and sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. Not daring to move, I watched.

               

“How did the medical examination go?” he asked. I winced, remembering the cold table and scary looking room. The nurse wasn’t very polite and I had panicked, they’d administered some sedative tablets that had calmed me down a bit to undergo the exam.

                “Fine.” He did me a favour by not keeping me in there much longer, just told me to come back if I had another attack of anxiety. I wouldn’t, he was aware of that when he told me, but he wished me a good day, anyway.