LOVED ALWAYS | namjin.

Chapter 37

"I-is everything o-okay" Jin asked trying and trying not to show his nervousness in his voice. He didn't want Namjoon to say, he was with Taehyung. Maybe that was selfish, but god he liked Namjoon.

Was it that bad to want someone to be yours for once? To love someone so much they hurt you, I've waited way too long. He's already Tae's, Jin thought. It's my fault, I'm just not good enough.

"I-it's fine, T-Tae uhhhh he broke up with me" Namjoon, said his eyes happy, which confused Jin. He looked happy?

"A-are you okay" Jin asked softly and the sweet smile Namjoon sent him made his heart skip. God, he was so in love. At least he admmited it.

"Yes I'm fine, I-I loved Taehyung once, and he was there for me and naturally we were together, knew it was going to happen. But thinking back, I-I just realized we were never meant to be" Namjoon slowly said and Jin couldn't help the huge smile that blossomed on his face, that was until Namjoon said the next words.

"B-but someone else made me realize it, h-he's a real nice guy. I-I think I-I might a-actually l-lo-love him" Namjoon barely stuttered out, and Jin felt his heart sink to the bottom of his stomach.

Of course, he should have fucking known. Why has he actually ever thought he had a chance with Namjoon? It hurt, god, it hurt so fucking much.

But maybe Jin liked to torture himself but he wanted to know. He wanted to know what this guy had that he didn't have, why Namjoon loved him. Why he was not good enough, why he couldn't be with this boy. Why Namjoons heart belonged to him? Why?

"Oh" Jin heard himself echo "What's so great about him?" He asked and Namjoon's eyes sparkled, that was probably love he saw in them Jin thought bitterly.

"Wellll, he's a great guy. He has like this cheeky little smile, that when I see that I can't help but smile myself. And his laugh, oh don't even get me started in his laugh, it's just so adorable. And he's so damn confident, he says he's handsome all the time. And he is, he's so beautiful"

What do you do with a broken heart?

"I-I don't know what to do with the way he makes me feel, it's amazing. It makes me feel alive, the way he looks at me. The way he loves life, it makes me love him. And just the way he enjoys everything, it makes me see things in a new perspective I guess. Plus, I can talk to him for hours and hours on end. We talk about the stupidest things, but it holds so much meaning to me. I-I love him" Namjoon finished, his gaze directly boring into Jin's own teary ones.

Jin looked away, this hurt, this hurt so fucking much. "I-I'm happy for you, you sound happy. So happy" he finally said and looked at the ground and he couldn't help it the tears feel out.

He was happy for Namjoon, all he really just wanted was for him to be happy. If he was happy, Jin would try to be happy. No matter how much it hurt him.

"Jin don't be d-dense, it's y-you I-I'm talking about"