The Devil In Me

Chapter 20

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The dream had shaken her, turning up again, refusing to diminish. As she opened her eyes in the morning, she looked upon the reason for it's persistence. The memories of her parents' last night, were the source of all her fear and insecurities, she knew that well enough. And they were all coming to the surface, because of the man sleeping beside her, his strong arms holding her safe against him.

And, it did make her feel safe, and contented somehow. She thought back to the night in the kitchen, and how she had felt knowing that this man would be hers, and she would be his, that they would be bound together forever. Now, lying beside him, seeing him vulnerable and resting, she felt like reaching out and touching his face, as though she wanted to feel his keen blue eyes on her. At the same time, however, she knew that would change everything. Then, things would have to be talked about, problems aired, feelings discussed, and it was all such a tangled mess she felt weary even contemplating it. Now, here, with his closed eyes and open arms, she felt close to him, and she didn't want it to end just yet. She gently laid her head back on his solid chest and snuggled deeper into his warm embrace. Letting a deep breath out, she closed her eyes, and felt a wave of calm sweep over her, missing the small smile that appeared on the face above hers.

When Sophie came in, Klaus had been awake for a while, since Caroline had woken, and returned to sleep. Feeling her wake, and then choose to fall back asleep in his arms had been indescribable. It was elating and simultaneously bewildering. Why did this astonishing creature trust him so? Why did she continue to tolerate him? When would she realise that he had nothing to give her in return? The maid appeared at the door, and he saw the shock of seeing them together register in her eyes, even as she bobbed and started at her work. Klaus thought he might have seen a small look of relief, and he was glad for it, he wanted Caroline surrounded by people who cared about her, though he knew it was next to impossible for someone not to.

She stirred in his arms, and looked up at him. Her blue eyes were clear and she looked much rested. They stared at each other for a few moments longer, until he murmured.

"Good morning, my dear." she sat up, and slid out of bed, without a word. He held back his frown and mirrored her movements, standing beside the bed. Caroline pulled on her dressing gown and then turned to look at him. Her look was a little guarded and he knew immediately that one night of comfort was not going to erase everything else. He decided to take the initiative.

"I shall leave you." he said, turning toward his dressing room. She watched him go, her heart in her mouth. She wanted to thank him, for making her feel safe again, for carrying her from her fire filled dreams, yet she didn't know how. How to be with him, when she still hadn't fully forgiven him.

"You look well this morning milday" Sophie said as she came and started to lay out Caroline's clothes. Caroline looked up at her, and smiled.

"His lordship too" Sophie said, hoping she was not overstepping her place. Caroline sat at her mirror and started to fix her hair.

"Allow me" Sophie said, coming up behind her, and taking up a brush, running it through Caroline's long, blonde locks. A noise made her raise her eyes to the mirror and she saw Klaus standing at the door, already dressed in his riding clothes, an inscrutable look on his face.

"Caroline. I -" he started, and then stopped, completely lost for words. What did he know about smoothing things over with women? He had no idea what to do in this situation, and it made him frustrated beyond belief. He gave a short, formal bow, and turned on his heel, striding from the room. He had to get outside, get on his horse and put some distance between himself, and the most complicated, confounding woman he had ever met. His breath frosted the air as he started over the dew covered grass, as he walked fast, pushing his legs, enjoying the way the muscles protested.