Beneath The Surface

The Text

A sound of something breaking, I awake from sleep
He'd been sleeping as a way to distract himself, but a sound brings out to face reality.

A sound full of unfamiliarity, Try to cover my ears but can't go to sleep
He hears a voice he doesn't recognize and tries to block it out, running back to the dream state he'd woken from. But no matter how much he covers his ears he'd still hear the voice. (Basically saying that it was coming from inside him rather than an outside force)

The pain in my throat gets worse, Try to cover it but I don't have a voice
After yelling so much in attempt to hear his voice, his throat begins to hurt. He tries to overpower the voice but he can't hear himself

Today I hear that sound again
Instead of hearing his own voice he hears the unfamiliar one again (V) talking as if it's him but he doesn't recognize it as his own voice

It's ringing again, that sound, A crack again on this frozen lake
Tae continues to hear the voice (V) and after a while he also hears the sound of something breaking. As though the voice is slowly revealing something

I dumped myself  into the lake, I buried my voice for you
Tae starts to remember how he got there in the first place, why the voice seemed so unfamiliar. That he'd hidden himself away keeping his true voice muffled by the ice (the mask he wore for the members)

Over the winter lake I was thrown, A thick ice has formed
Tae says that the ice is thick meaning that it'd been frozen for a while. Explaining again why he didn't recognize it.

In the dream I shortly went into, My agonizing phantom pain is still the same
He says that even after burying himself things still remained painful.

Have I lost myself Or have I gained you
He says that if he was in pain either way what was the point of all of it. If he'd lost himself doing this for them (the members) did he even get what he wanted  (their love)

I suddenly run to the lake, There's my face in it
Thinking about it made him realize what he'd done to himself. Now seeing the person he kept buried

Please don't say anything, Reach my hand out to cover the mouth
But even after realizing what he was doing he couldn't bring himself to show it (his true feelings) So he tried to silence the voice (V) again, begging it to go away

But in the end, spring will come someday, The ice will melt and flow away
But even after still trying to keep it hidden he couldn't turn away from the truth. His feelings slowly wearing down on the mask he'd put on

Tell me if my voice isn't real
He continues to ask (v) who he is, wondering if what he believes to be his own voice is real

If I shouldn't have thrown myself away
He asks if hiding his true self away was the right choice

Tell me if this pain isn't real
He wants to know if he's still dreaming or did he finally wake up. If this is the reality he has to face.

What was I supposed to do back then
He then asks if things ended up like this because he threw himself away then what should he have done.

Yeah so~ were just going to pretend that after 3 months the members understand that this was what he was going through. Although they don't know V's name they just know Tae had a voice in his head.