My English Love Affair

Chapter 16

This is everything I didn't say.

********

*Chesnie P.O.V.*

I'm feeling so down. I miss Bella so much with all my heart.

I just want to tell her....Everything I Didn't say.

I wish I could've made her stay, But I'm the only one to blame. Really I am. I love Liz and Arabella. Their such amazing friends.

But Bella...This is everything I didn't say.

I want to do it so bad, But I promised Ashton I wouldn't use that shiny silver magic. I want to so so bad.... so much it hurts.

No one will notice. Its just once.

I picked it up, and pressed down...Then I took it off.. its not worth it. Don't do it.

Sometimes rejection is gods protection.

I couldn't stop myself but I ended up writing down that sing lol I'm so dramatic!

Taking every breath away. With all of the mistakes I've made. From all the letters that I've saved. This Is Everything I Didn't Say.

I failed everyone.... I ended up cutting...but I only did one...its not to bad...right?

I wish I could've made you stay! And I'm the only one to blame! I Know that its a little to late! But

This

Is

Everything

I

Didn't

Say........

I started crying I didn't mean too.

I just miss her too much.

Even though she ditched me like that.

I still love her to death. She was my sister. and I messed it up! but its my fault I'm the only one to blame.

*Calum P.O.V.*

Calum: CUS I DONT KNOWWWWW IF I CAN LET YOU GOOO!!

I heard crying in the bathroom.

Calum: Hey who's got a sad face in here!!

I saw Chesnie on the floor she had blood all over her and she was crying so hard.

Calum: OH MY GO- CHESNIE COME HERE!

I helped her up. This is the second time. I can't let her do this. I know this is bad, but I kinda have feelings for Chesnie. I know she's Ashton's but, I can't help it.

Chesnie: Calum its ok I'm fine *wipes away tears* I'll be alright. Just get me Ashton or Liz... or Arabella. Just someone PLS!

Calum: Ok heres my shirt.

I gave her my shirt. ;)

*Ashton P.O.V.*

Calum: ASH

Ashton: Oh my Gosh Calum where is your shirt!

Calum: Never mind that! Chesnie needs you she's in the bathroom!

Ashton: Oh no!! Ok thank you!

I ran to the restroom. I saw Chesnie sitting there. She was using Calum s shirt to clean up the blood that was everywhere.

Ashton: Baby I thought you weren't gonna do this anymore.

Chesnie: Ash babe I'm sorry. I miss Bella. I couldn't help it!

Ashton: Forget her babe. Don't even think about it! You have Liz and Arabella.... their way better than any Bella!

I held Chesnie. I wrapped my arms around her. It calmed her down.

Chesnie: Ash thank you I don't know what I would so without you!

Ashton: I heard you wrote a song called Daydreamin. Why don't you go wash up and then afterwards sing me the song!

Chesnie: Ok I will.

*Chesnie P.O.V.*

After Ashton left I just sat there on the bathroom floor.

I just want to be alone. Have you ever hated someone so much that you can't even look at them.

I do.

I can't even look in the mirror without being disgusted by what a horrible person I am.

I should've known better than to freaking cut myself.

Liz tells me if I hadn't I wouldn't of found out what kind of friend she is.

I can't help it I love her so much

( Not in a homo way tho...you know what I mean)

I don't know why I haven't just killed myself yet.

Am I still not worth that much?

Now that I think of it.

Why does Ariel want to be a human so badly. The human world its a mess.

All I've ever wanted to be was a mermaid. No worries about anything.