My psycho twin step brothers

Chapter 32

Caleb

I fucked up, how could she walk out on me like that?! I know I was wrong for doing what I did but she proved me right when she went with him.

She's the first person she called when she was upset instead of me! Out of all people I was there for her! I made sure she was safe all this time and this is how she relays me?!

I killed Michael and Ms. White just so we could be together, but it seems I killed the wrong person. I should've killed that Mark guy instead, he's the real threat now I kind of feel bad for offing Michael right now.

I knew those two didn't share a romantic relationship and at least I would've known where she was instead of trying to find her on my own. I could've asked for help, but I needed to do this on my own, she was my Babygirl, and I was going to make her listen to my apology that I've said so many times I've lost count.

I've been changing though; I've even started going to therapy for my anger issues.

"How are you feeling today, Caleb?" Dr. Lewis asks me, he's been a real help ever since I've lost my sweet Abby and I can see myself progressing over the time she's been gone.

"I'm better, I haven't tried calling her today and I've been paying more attention to my dog. I've realized I've been neglecting her ever since Abby left but it's hard when I just......."

"Let it out, no one's here to judge you"

"I just- I want to rip his fucking throat out!" I groan in frustration, I try keeping these feelings bottled up, but they always seem to resurface.

"We're talking about her best friend Mark, right?"

"Yes him! It's always him! He came in with that shit excuse with them just being friends, I knew than not to trust him, but I was jealous, and I couldn't see past that and that's when she left" I sighed, reliving that night over and over again hoping she'll return and give my life meaning again but she hasn't even called yet.

He's already heard this story a million times, but he always listens, it helps when I talk about it, and he assured me that I can change.

"Why don't you call her then Caleb? She's probably waiting for you to call her"

"I thought that same thing, but I know Abby, she doesn't want to hear from me just yet. She's waiting for the right time, and I want to be calmed and mellow when she finally decides to actually call me up, I don't want to frighten her or make her see me as the same aggressive person I never want to hurt her"

It's true, I never did want to hurt her, but I know I have. I know that I've been so caught up in my own feelings that I didn't see past the things I was actually doing to the girl I love, she wanted me to trust and believe in her, but I couldn't when her ex was back in her life!

I felt threatened by him, he made her smile and talk about old times, and I just didn't know how to handle all the things that happened. He wanted to take her away from me but instead of me fighting for her, I drive her right into the bastards' arms!

She was loyal to me, and I didn't trust her, I didn't trust that they were just painting at his home, but could you blame me? She was defending him, and she never mentioned that they dated, it sounded suspicious to me.

I'm trying so hard not to call Paul and just kill him also; Dr. Lewis has helped me with my rage of wanting anyone that poses a threat to me or Abby dead. He says it will all catch up to me one day, but I didn't care, all those who died are now dead for a reason.

It's not my fault people don't understand boundaries, maybe if they weren't trying to take Abby away from me, they would still be living to see another day, but I guess not.

"What are you thinking Caleb, this is an open space for you to be yourself and work out your problems. Don't hold back now"

"I miss her. I miss the affect she has on me when she's around , I miss the way she smiles and how she does this cute little giggle when I chase her around the house, I miss coming home from work and knowing when I walk through the door that she'll be in the room with one of my shirts on while waiting up for me, I miss the smell of her hair and how she cuddles next to me when she asleep , I miss the sex we had almost every night. Man, sex is like a drug you can never get tired of, no matter how much you try to control yourself you simply can't because she just drives you crazy"

I smile as I remember all the I love You's we've ever said and all the nights I came home to see her sprawled across the bed watching the tv until I came home, I remember her telling me that she couldn't sleep if I wants t next to her.

"Why do you think you feel this way about her?"

"Have you been listening to anything I've said for the past month? She a freaking goddess, she's absolutely perfect in every way. I wished for a woman like her to walk in my life and when she did, I screwed it up with someone I could care less about"

"What do you think you should do about it Caleb?"

"I don't know... I want to call her but I'm afraid she won't pick up or she'll go off on me about not contacting her anymore"

"Is that why you don't want to call her? You're afraid of rejection?"

"From her? Yes, I don't know what I'll do if she rejected me"

"But you've shown progress, I can vouch for you on that one"

"You think I should call her up?" I ask worriedly, is this right therapy?

Shouldn't I be staying away from her due to our past and my dominant ways?

"I think you should do anything that feels right. Don't scare her just go easy and try to remain calm"

He was right, I have changed and maybe she'll see that too. I'm not going into this without being sure if I'll be able to keep my cool, I need her relaxed the whole time.

"I'm going to call her!"
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You guys have no idea how bad I want to publish these two books I've started. They are.... wow and I'm not saying that just because I'm the author😂

See why I haven't posted in a while though, I'm truly sorry about that I've just been caught up in writing these😩

Please forgive me😔