Thick and Thin [l. hemmings]

two

Things at college started going really well. I was passing my classes with phenomenal grades, I was working, and making new friends and strengthening those relationships.

Luke and I still talked everyday. Some days it was only texting and some of those days it wasn't for very long. I was trying my hardest to balance out everything, but it started taking a toll on me.

One night, before a midterm, I started having a panic attack. I had no idea what was happening, and Nina wasn't home to help me, which just scared me even more. Ashton's roommate answered when I frantically knock on their door. All I remember was asking for Ashton over and over.

//

"Kelsey? What's wrong, hey, what's wrong?" Ashton questions, gently pushing me back into the hall and closing the door behind him. He leads me back into my room.

Ashton sits me on my bed, before sitting across from me.

I sit cross legged, trying to take deep breathes, but failing, "Ash- Ashton, I- I can't breathe-"

"Kels, you'll be okay. You're having a panic attack."

"How- how do you-"

"My sister would have them all the time. Just keeps breathing." He tells me, resting his hands on my thighs.

I nod, acknowledging the fact he's speaking to me, but feeling like I can't even speak.

"This is only temporary, it's going to be over soon."

My eyes stay tightly shut, trying to figure out how to work my way through this. I have no idea what to do. But I have Ashton here to help me out.

"Kels, how are you feeling?" Ashton questions, once my breathing starts to steady.

I nod, "I think I'm okay? I don't know, I- I..."

"We're just gonna watch some Netflix, and try to get some sleep okay?" He tells me, doing his best to keep my mind off it.

"Yeah, okay, thanks." I weakly smile.

He sits on my bed, and I lay with him, the two of us staying in my bed as we watch the show.

//

That night, Ashton never left. He held me the entire night as I slept. I don't think he slept much, he said he was worried about me. I told him it wasn't that bad, and that I'd be fine. But he said that he knew I wasn't okay and that he knew it was a bad panic attack. So, he wanted to stay and make sure I'd be fine and that I got the sleep I needed to take my exam.

It was one of the nicest things anybody at college had ever done for me. I knew I had the greatest best friend.

Having a friend like that made me feel great. Going away to college I was worried I'd have nobody. One of my biggest fears was not having somebody here for me. Ashton really is a great friend, and I couldn't be more thankful for him.

The next couple months were great Ashton, Nina and I became closer to Ashton's roommate Kyle. He was exactly like Ashton; I don't know why it took us so long to finally start hanging out with him.

Spring break came along, and I was originally planning to go home to be with Luke, and to see my family and my friends.

But those plans changed. Ashton, Kyle, Nina and I ended up taking a trip. Kyle had a car, and he was so excited to drive us through his home state of California. We decided to drive up the coast. We made a few stops on our way up to San Francisco. Luke flew out to San Francisco for two days and we let the group do their own thing while Luke and I ventured off.